Cat and Parakeet
The New York City Crime Report with Pat Dixon
Pat Dixon
4.2 • 831 Ratings
🗓️ 23 November 2020
⏱️ 72 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Grizzled NightWatch detective Pete Paduccio retired from NYPD in July, at which point I bothered him about doing New York City Crime Report with Pat Dixon until he actually fking did it, I was shocked.
He adds his own stories of bizarre murders - decapitated pets (yes, plural), a recently-deceased husband wrapped up to be mailed out of state and more - to stories of an ex-con who slit his own throat to get out of a traffic ticket; an unhinged and violent predator arrested after punching Moranis and others; debunking the deeply unpopular "seasonal flu" restrictions; black mayonnaise, and prob'ly some other shit.
Pat Dixon is a real standup comedian and fake journalist, truthfully covering real crime news in America's largest city - world's loneliest town.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | From the smallest room in New York City comes a show that gives you a reason to live. |
| 0:06.1 | Occasionally interesting, occasionally enlightening, and sometimes a little bit nasty. |
| 0:10.5 | Joining me now is the one and only Pete Paduccio. |
| 0:14.3 | Hey Pete, how are you? |
| 0:15.3 | Good evening. |
| 0:15.7 | Good evening. |
| 0:15.8 | You're a 40-year detective at NYPD, and that's a very rare career. |
| 0:23.3 | I'm just bold. |
| 0:24.5 | The Nightwatch. |
| 0:26.1 | Night watch makes a sound, that's like a good name for a TV show or something |
| 0:29.6 | shit. |
| 0:30.1 | Yeah, it sounds cool. |
| 0:31.2 | Sounds great. |
| 0:31.7 | Especially when Game of Thrones was out. |
| 0:34.6 | They had the night watch. |
| 0:35.9 | They had the night watch. |
| 0:37.5 | Oh, that was for the cake. |
| 0:38.8 | Oh, right? |
| 0:39.5 | Darkness falls and my watch begins. |
| 0:42.0 | So you guys weren't actually knighted. |
| 0:44.2 | You just worked at night. |
| 0:46.2 | What were the hours? |
... |
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