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The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck Podcast

Building Real Confidence, The Motivation Puzzle, and Understanding All Your “Parts”

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck Podcast

Mark Manson

Self-improvement, Education

4.83.8K Ratings

🗓️ 22 January 2025

⏱️ 53 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Drew comes in hot today as we dig into the nitty gritty of confidence and motivation. We explore the counterintuitive idea that true confidence doesn't come from expecting success, but from being comfortable with failure. If you've ever struggled with self-doubt or felt demotivated despite external achievements, this episode might just change your perspective.


We start by dissecting what I call the "Confidence Conundrum" and how it applies to various aspects of life, from business to relationships. Then, we challenge some long-held beliefs about intrinsic and extrinsic motivation, discussing research that questions the idea that external rewards always undermine our natural interests. We wrap up with a thought-provoking exploration of Internal Family Systems theory and how understanding the different "parts" of our psyche can lead to greater self-integration. This is a grab bag episode that we had a lot of fun with, so I hope you enjoy it.



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Chapters:

00:00 Drew comes in hot 00:53 The F*ck of the Week: Confidence 21:55 Brilliant or Bullsh*t: Intrinsic vs Extrinsic Motivation 42:44 Q&A: What do you think of "parts work"?


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Theme song: Icarus Lives by Periphery , used with permission from Periphery.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Mark.

0:01.0

Yes.

0:02.0

I got a bone to pick with you.

0:03.0

Uh-oh.

0:04.0

I'm coming in hot today.

0:05.0

It's not my fault.

0:06.0

I'm coming in hot today.

0:07.0

No, no, no.

0:08.0

Okay.

0:09.0

So lately, I've been doing all this work, getting these episodes ready.

0:13.0

I do this, all this background research.

0:15.0

Yeah.

0:16.0

Come up with these ideas.

0:17.0

And then you come in here and you just shit all over him. You shit all over them, Mark.

0:24.6

So I got a bone to pick with you.

0:26.1

I'm coming in hot today.

0:27.1

Okay.

0:27.6

I got copious notes.

0:29.4

Oh, boy.

0:30.2

I stayed up late last night, going over this, got a good night's sleep.

0:33.2

Got up early.

0:34.4

Went over these again.

...

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