Morning.

You're all right?

I hope you are. I genuinely hope you are.

Come on, wakey, waky eggs and baking. Come on, get up.

Wake up, sleepy head. The day's half over. It's half over already.

All right. It's 8 in the A.M. British summertime on Tuesday, the 9th of June, in the year of our Lord. 2026, you're the glorious band, the chosen for you, my band of brothers and sisters, the very best among us. Watching this live, what more could ask for? Brilliant. Brilliant. Hope you're bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, rocking and raring for the day ahead.

Another day, another dollar, another chance to put right what once went wrong.

As always, I'm joined by my producer, Little Harry. How are this morning? Good sir.

Morning. Yeah, I'm all good.

Great.

Excellent. Sorry, I've got episodes. It's just slightly one. He knows. Earlier this morning, I sneezed loads of times.

Loads of times. 10, 20 times. If my eyes are a bit bloodshot, not because I'm hung over.

I'm sneezed those. A bit of hay fever, I think. Oh, actually, you stop faffing about, though.

What was all that fannying about?'s just get on with it what's the legacy

corporate mainstream media banging on about this morning what is that evil cabal of evil fleet

street editors what they're trying to tell you is important or not as the case may be what have we

got okay today Israel and Iran stepped back for now for the moment.

Okay, good, I suppose.

And is uni a waste of money, university?

Also, which isn't including here, but most of the front papers go with,

the owner, co-owner of West Ham United Football Club, my football club, a billionaire dude,

a British billionaire dude in his late 70s, is actually allegedly, some sort of sex pest.

...