The Bugle, audio newspaper for a visual world.

Hello, Bugles and welcome to Bugle 4114 sub-app episode CWCF.

I am Andy Zoltzman, but if it wasn't for this microphone right here, I would be...

So I count myself very fortunate.

So what does CWCF stand for?

Well, it is not as you might very reasonably think, an acronym describing the two candidates

in the Tory leadership race, the president of America and the state of global democracy

in general.

A good guester.

Nor is it a world's village, nor is it the sequence of animals eaten by Henry VIII to the

Bugle standard working lunch in the 1530s, written again in acronym form, chicken, wildebeest,

crocodile, flamingo.

Now, in fact, CWCF stands for Cricket World Cup Final, which happens tomorrow as I record

quite possibly today as you listen to this maybe even right now or yesterday or in the

dim and distant past when hope still lived in the hearts of humanity, delete as applicable.

It's England vs New Zealand at Lords and London, with me in the BBC commentary box trying

very hard to suppress the urge to shout, holy shit!

If you'd told a 10-year-old Andy Zoltzman he'd be doing this, he would have dissolved

instantaneously into a pool of quivering and graduality.

So England and here's another bit to delete according to when you're listening to this,

are strong and rightful pre-match favourites, or are rumping to a glorious victory out of

danger by almighty's use in the Magna Carta, or are scaring things up royally in the grand

...