Get this and get it straight. Crime is a suckers road and those who travel it wind up in the gut of the prison of the grave.

The story you are about to hear is true, only the names have been changed to protect the innocent.

The Adventures of Sam Spade Detective.

The Adventures of the Saints starring Vincent Prize

Bob Bailey in the exciting adventures of the man with the action-packed expense account

America's fabulous freelance insurance investigator.

Yours truly, Johnny Deller. And the Happy Holidays and Welcome to our midweek bonus episode of Down These Mean Streets coming to you on the day before the night before Christmas.

For our final round of Christmas comedies this holiday season, we're returning to one of the

all-time greatest shows of the radio era, the Jack Benny

program.

Now Jack's reputation as a skinflint was a big part of his radio character and it fueled no show. This running came at Christmas time when Jack would venture out to a department store and

slowly but surely drive a sales clerk up the wall as he hemmed and hawed over picking out the right gift, the right gift, and even

more importantly, at the right price.

Today we'll hear three of those infamous Christmas shopping trips, beginning with an episode that kicked off the tradition.

In this show, originally aired on NBC on December 8, 1946, Jack debates over what sort of shoelaces to buy for announcer

Don Wilson, and the great Mel Blank is the suffering salesman.

But he's not the only employee in the store

to feel the stress of the season.

Gerald Moore, who was a few years away

from starring as Philip Marlow on radio, plays another clerk,

patiently trying to assist Dennis Day with his purchases.

Then we'll jump to an episode originally aired on NBC on December 19th, 1948.

...