Bob and the Forgiveness Spell

Proxy with Yowei Shaw

Yowei Shaw

Personal Journals, Society & Culture

4.8 • 589 Ratings

🗓️ 4 November 2025

⏱️ 47 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

The case of the woman who wants to forgive her mom, but doesn't know how.

Erin wants to forgive her mother. Not because her mother deserves it. Not because Erin wants a relationship with her. But because Erin is tired of feeling so angry.

The problem is, forgiveness feels like science fiction. How do you release resentment toward someone who hurt you deeply? How do you stop being mad without pretending what happened was okay?

In this episode, Yowei connects Erin with Robert Enright — a psychologist who helped pioneer the science of forgiveness.Together, they investigate what forgiveness is, what it isn’t, and whether it’s possible to loosen resentment without letting someone off the hook.

From the episode:

— Find Robert Enright — find his forgiveness program and free resources at the International Forgiveness Institute: www.internationalforgiveness.com

— Read his book Forgiveness Is A Choice: A Step-By-Step Process for Resolving Anger and Restoring Hope

New to Proxy? Try Bisexual Wife Guy for a classic case, or JC's Kids Won't Talk To Her for another story when your version of a relationship doesn't match theirs

For episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get our free newsletter File Under Feelings at proxyhq.org.

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Get in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey everyone, it's YoA. I'm here to tell you about a brand new show in the Radiotopia family,
0:06.1	a partnership with the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and fellow indie network talkhouse.
0:11.5	It's called Music Makes Us, and it's hosted by literal icon, the legendary Kathleen Hanna,
0:18.0	the frontwoman of Bikini Kill and the Tigra.
0:22.9	In each episode, she sits down with revolutionary musicians like Chaka Khan, Olivia Rodriguez, and Haley Williams of Paramore to talk about
0:29.4	things artists really want to talk about, things like perfect lyrics, unforgettable shows,
0:36.1	treasured artifacts, even snacks. You'll also hear bonus episodes
0:40.8	with rock and roll Hall of Fame curator Shelby Morrison, who tells the backstory of an object
0:46.7	from their incredible archive, such as Prince's guitar and Katie Pearson of the B-52's wig.
0:54.2	Music Makes Us is now out wherever you listen to podcasts.
1:03.2	Hello.
1:04.7	Hey, babe, where are you with the mix of the episode?
1:08.4	Hello to you too.
1:10.9	Listen, we got an episode to publish.
1:14.1	It's late.
1:15.0	I want to know what the status is.
1:17.5	All right.
1:18.8	I'm like halfway through it.
1:20.9	Ah.
1:21.8	Yeah, I mean, I'd be going faster if your mic technique was a little better.
1:29.1	Okay. I will make this quick.
1:31.7	Kyle, tell the people what the final tally was for the campaign.
	...

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