Here, Burtcha.

All right, maybe what you are missing in your life.

Maybe you need a mean friend, Abby.

Not, I'm not saying you're the mean friend.

Who brought this to us?

Not me.

Okay, never mind.

Not you.

Go ahead, hit it.

I just saw a video that a girl posted about the front boys that live next door to her that came

onto her porch and took her porch swing over to their yard so they could sit in it

and drink beer for the rest of the afternoon. Mind you, they didn't ask her if they

could borrow her porch swing and this girl is sitting in her house watching

this happen through the blinds at her house and I'm telling you the only thing that I could think when I was watching that is girl you need to get yourself a mean friend because I understand not everybody is cut from the mean cloth okay

there's some of y'all that God made gentle and docile and kind and I can assure you

if God made you that way he also made you a best friend who is not that way.

You need to find the mean friend that God created for you because a mean friend is going to

solve so many problems because they're going to take it

incredibly personally when someone upsets you a mean friend gives off the aura

that assures people it would be better for them to have a colonoscopy in the woods with a dull stick

than mess with you because they take that personally.

If you were created to be gentle and kind. You need to find the mean friend that God

...