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I've been really upsetting a couple audiences trying to convince them that the first conspiracy theory we ever knew was in middle school that someone got peanut butter looked out their genitals.

Yeah. I can name the girl that I thought in middle school.

Yeah, and somebody jerked off in school.

Yeah, it was the jerk off and the peanut butter. Jerked off in the building. Someone got peanut butter and licked off their genitals.

Yeah, for sure. And jerked off in the building and going anywhere from in a class to in the bathroom.

Most of the time it was always in the bathroom.

Locker room was always the, like, I heard you did the locker room.

Just beating dick. I've never beaten dick in school.

No way.

I never did. Nothing I never, I'm not currently in school. If I was in school now, I'd probably beat off.

You know, it really actually strikes me as in the world we're in, the cell phone world room.

I would have beat off a school twice a day.

I honestly, I could have, if there would have been Facebook, I would have, if I could have seen a profile pic of a girl I had a crush on and she was in a bikini photo.

I would have gone down to the bathrooms and the back of the building and fucking taken one out.

Not me, dude. I'd have found someone who looks like somebody from school and just pounded fucking baloney to it.

I mean, they would have been, yeah, they would have been stains for me all over those school seats.

For sure.

You don't think about that now with, with all these cell phones, like high school and middle school have to be so much more difficult being like, I saw a picture of your dick and you're like, how?

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