Being a Dom (w/ Sapphira Cristál)
Why Won't You Date Me? with Nicole Byer
Headgum & Nicole Byer
4.9 • 16K Ratings
🗓️ 6 March 2026
⏱️ 60 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Drag queen Sapphira Cristál (Drag Race S16) joins Nicole for an educational chat about being a dom, impact play, and the 12-hour prep cycle for bottoming - including how to douche properly and the secret medication trick for staying clean through the night.
Sapphira tells the story of how she met her partner through an Instagram gym thirst trap originally meant for another drag queen, and the time she gave a blowjob so good that a man wrote a song about it.
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Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Want to watch this episode? Catch the full video on YouTube. Just hit the link in the episode |
| 0:04.4 | description. This is a headgum podcast. I'm not a bottom. I am a top who bottoms occasionally. |
| 0:14.8 | You know what I mean? Yes. And so occasionally I'll be like, I got the itch. I think I want to do it. |
| 0:20.8 | Or I'll see someone and be like, you're sexy. |
| 0:23.1 | And they're like, I'm atop. |
| 0:23.9 | And I was like, well, that's not going to stop us from having sex. I'll tell you that. We'll figure this out. Because one thing I am doing, I'm dragging a wagon over here. So I have a fat ass. And if you have a long limousine, then you can get into this garage. |
| 0:36.9 | Because it's going to take a long limousine to get through this driveway, honey, because it is quite a large one. |
| 0:45.1 | I'm a big believer in looking out for one another, especially when it comes to our health. We all deserve to have a say in our own futures. |
| 0:53.5 | But right now, that freedom is under attack. |
| 0:56.2 | Planned Parenthood Federation of America is on the front lines, making sure sexual and |
| 1:00.6 | reproductive health care stays accessible for everyone, no matter what. |
| 1:05.2 | Whether you need STI testing and treatment, birth control, gender affirming care, abortion, or sex education, |
| 1:12.7 | Planned Parenthood is here for you. And for all of us, honestly. But right now, lawmakers and |
| 1:19.0 | opponents of abortion access are preventing people from getting essential care. They're trying to |
| 1:23.7 | deny people birth control and promoting abstinence only until marriage programs, |
| 1:29.5 | which to be real is just like, ew, God, it's like 2026. We are so past that. They quite |
| 1:35.2 | literally want to control our bodies and our decisions like we're little puppets. Right now, |
| 1:40.5 | millions of people could lose access to care, especially black and Latino people, people in rural areas, and people with low incomes. |
| 1:48.2 | Planned Parenthood believes health care is a human right that everyone deserves. |
| 1:52.5 | Supporters like you, power this work. |
| 1:54.9 | Donate to support Planned Parenthood now at planparenthood.org slash defend. |
| 2:00.4 | Listen, we've all had our brains completely sabotage a good time. |
... |
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