Batch 298: Oops! All White Whales
Malt Couture
Alex Kidd
4.9 • 812 Ratings
🗓️ 9 October 2025
⏱️ 104 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Alex busts out his trusty ticking harpoon and hunts down four beers off the White Whale list. Lost Abbey Veritas 006, Stone Brewing Vertical Epic 02.02.02 Encore, New Glarus R&D Very Sour Blackberry (re-release), and Cantillon Loerik go head-to-head and then get put through the Power Ranking treatment. In the Beer News, a series of closures sadden and anger the craft beer community, Unibroue La Fin du Monde celebrates its 30th anniversary, and John Mulaney releases a line of NA beers.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | All right, all right, and welcome to Don't Drink Beer, presents |
| 0:08.2 | Malkator, the world's jankiest beer podcast. |
| 0:10.5 | This is fashion number two, nine to eight. |
| 0:13.0 | We've never rhymed anything with masturbate. |
| 0:16.3 | Like, we're so mature, Stephen. |
| 0:18.2 | Yeah, that's the thing. |
| 0:19.0 | I feel like we missed our window. |
| 0:20.7 | I thought Michael for sure would hit that in like episode three or four. |
| 0:25.6 | And then I was thinking about it. |
| 0:27.8 | It's like, we've never had a good laugh. |
| 0:30.9 | One of the funniest words ever to exist. |
| 0:33.6 | Just because we were like, we got this is serious journalism. |
| 0:37.8 | We're competing with the likes of good beer hunting. |
| 0:40.7 | We're competing with the beerists. |
| 0:43.2 | And then it turns out you just wait until those all get canceled. |
| 0:46.0 | And then you just say masturbate 300 episodes later. |
| 0:48.7 | Yeah. |
| 0:49.0 | It's an attrition thing, dude. |
| 0:51.2 | You either become the hero or you stick around long enough to become the gooner |
| 0:56.8 | you revile. |
| 0:57.7 | Yeah, masturbate. |
| 0:59.4 | Listen, it's self-love and also we're older now. |
... |
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