Avoiding Chaos in the Courtroom

Betrayal Trauma Recovery

Anne Blythe, M.Ed.

Education, Sexuality, Relationships, Mental Health, Society & Culture, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness

4.6 • 1.4K Ratings

🗓️ 29 June 2021

⏱️ 23 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Experiencing abuse, lies, and betrayal can leave you feeling in a fog. It can feel overwhelming. May be you are thinking: Can I stay? Am I going to take the step toward separation? What about divorce? What is going to happen? Regardless of what ends up happening, you can takes steps to ensure safety, preparation, and peace in the process as much as possible. Emotional Abuse Can Escalate During Separation Wendy Hernandez, creator of Command the Courtroom, says that women in situations of emotional abuse can and should begin to prepare early for various possibilities that can happen along the journey. "Often times the emotional abuse is in the form of legal abuse, once the divorce has gotten started. It can turn into a scorched earth type of litigation that goes on not only for months, but years. It can be destructive. Whoever is going through this, must do what makes sense for them. It can be a balance." -Wendy Hernandez, Command the Courtroom What is Post-Separation Abuse? It is important to focus on safety in the midst of the trauma and chaos of litigation. It can be hard to heal when safety is not secured. Post-separation abuse can and does occur, as the abuse just changes forms. Legal draining, constant litigation, and using the kids as pawns as some of the ways post-separation abuse can manifest. Here are some helpful hints for preparing for Post-Separation Abuse: Documentation is KEY!Communicate only in writing. Keep communication centered on children.Consider using an app or program like Our Family Wizard or Custody X Change.Be sure to respond appropriately to communication regarding children. BTR Can Be There For You The Betrayal Trauma Recovery Group is here for you. Join today and find a community of women who understand. You are not alone, no matter what.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to betrayal trauma recovery. This is Ann. I'm so excited to have Wendy Hernandez from
0:05.6	command the courtroom on today's episode. Before we get to that summer, ah, you know, you feel like
0:12.4	maybe you'll get a break from the abuse or from the traumatic experiences, but I have found that
0:17.6	summer is super traumatic and that so many times on car rides or trips or, you know, just where you
0:25.6	think, oh, things are going to be good. They do not go well at all. And that is why we created
0:30.6	betrayal trauma recovery group just in general for these types of events that not only happen
0:37.6	in the summer, but they happen on holidays. They happen over Christmas break. They happen all
0:42.5	the time. Most of the time, your typical therapist, number one, doesn't understand this type of
0:48.1	abuse. And number two, their weeks out or they take the week off or something for a holiday or
0:54.2	for the summer. The betrayal trauma recovery group is here for you. We have multiple sessions
0:59.2	a day in every single time zone. We recently had some new coaches join our team. We're so excited
1:04.8	to have them. So to check out the session schedule, go to btr.org and we'd love to see you in a session
1:10.6	today. Thank you to those of you who've given this podcast a five-star rating. Every single rating
1:15.3	and review that you add to Apple podcasts or your other podcasting apps helps isolated women find
1:20.8	us. It helps the algorithm. When I'm looking at things and it's something like connection is the
1:26.4	solution to abuse. And so then the victims just try to connect more with their abuser or other
1:33.2	ways of getting victims to misunderstand their situation. I don't want victims to find that. I
1:39.6	want them to find btr so that they know what they're looking at. They can get to emotional safety.
1:44.4	It's just so important that they find btr first and that they understand abuse before they go
1:48.5	down any other road. Before they go down the pornography addiction recovery road,
1:52.5	before they even consider a couple therapy, they need to really be versed and educated about abuse.
1:59.4	So thank you for sharing. Thank you for reviewing this. It helps those women get the education
	...

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