Hello and welcome to the political orphanage, a home for plucky misfits, problem solvers, and robots.

Scheming, automated artificial intelligence.

Speaking of them, I'm friends with a Google employee who once invited me to visit the Google

campus in Mountain View, California, the Googleplex, which is of course, amazing. The main thing I remember about the Googleplex

is that it has a swimming treadmill. Have you ever seen one of these? It's you can swim laps in place. It looks

like a bathtub from Star Trek. Like imagine in my mind I'm from Oklahoma. Imagine a robotic

horse trough that cycles water through at such a high rate

you can swim in place.

And there's lots of other things. There's healthy snacks everywhere, an on-site

chef in a free cafeteria, a ball pit to host meetings in, and a big

walk-in 360-degree Google Maps booth where I learned that if I am ever abducted by aliens and I somehow

commandeer their vessel, I can actually navigate from space to my parents backyard

using only natural landmarks and city formations.

None of these artifacts are surprising to stumble upon in the

headquarters of the world's largest search engine.

Google is a behemoth, a titan of industry, of data.

If information is the oil of the 21st century economy, Google is Mecca Rockefeller swimming away in his weird Star

track bathtub.

So noting all that,

the size and ambition of Google,

the invulnerability, the presumed immortality,

last month, Google reportedly issued a code red. Red alert at the Google

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