When we hold everyone else outside of us responsible for our own experience,

threat, you made me feel this way. And it's like absolutely, we are interdependent,

you know, we can trigger things and do things to hurt others. However, we also are responsible

for our own feelings and reactions. So yeah, it's getting to this root of taking responsibility

for ourselves, which that's hard. Welcome to Therapist Uncensored, building on decades of

professional experience this podcast tackles neurobiology, modern attachment, and more,

in an honest way that's helpful in healing humans. Your session begins now with Dr. Anne Kelly

and Sue Marriott. Hey everybody, welcome back to Therapist Uncensored, where we bring you the

latest on modern attachment and relational neurobiology in ways that you can use in everyday life.

We are pleased to continue to collect resources that add to complexity and context in the area

of attachment. How can we call it modern attachment without some of these updates, right?

For those outside the relational mainstream due to culture, queerness, kink, gender fluidity,

or those who are non-monogamous, we have you in mind for today's episode, specifically.

That's why we're doing it actually. However, we especially invite those who find these ideas

challenging or even weird to join in in this lively discussion. There's so much to learn

and so many assumptions to challenge. I know I learned a ton and it's a great conversation and

I think that you're going to love it. Or at least you're going to have feelings about it. I'll

just guarantee that. How about that? I sat down with Jessica Fern, who's the author of Polysecure,

Attachment, Trauma, and Nominogamy. Specifically to bring us up to date on understanding

security and relational configurations that are not typically studied or understood and boy

did she deliver. Jessica Fern is a psychotherapist, a certified clinical trauma professional,

and she has an international private practice where she works with individuals, couples, and people

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