Welcome to the awesome marriage podcast. I'm your co-host, Christina Dodson. This is an Ask

Dr. Kim segment where people submit their questions for Dr. Kim Kim, and he answers them.

Thanks for listening.

Today I'm asked Dr. Kim, the question is, I feel like my spouse doesn't care to know me. What do I do?

Wow, how, like, discouraging that must be to feel like your spouse doesn't really want to know you because it's a big part of love as, you know, being known and being, we all want to be fully known. You know, that is just in us and, you know, because God fully knows us.

So Dr. Kim, what would likely cause someone to feel like their spouse

doesn't care to know them or to know about them? You know, I think the big thing would be is

when you're talking, they don't listen. Your spouse is thinking about something else. Or you can

just tell that they're just sitting there kind of tapped in their fingers just, okay, when is he or

she going to shut up so I can get out of here? You know, they're not listening. And so then you feel

they don't care a thing about what I'm saying. It's not important to them. Things important to me are

not important to them. And then that deal of they don't, they don't care about knowing me at all.

So I think not listing is huge. And then just not spending time together with your spouse you know if

you're just like I just don't have time for him or her and so then it's like you don't value me

you don't value me as a person you like it that I help take care of the kids and whether I bring a

paycheck home or that I cook dinner or I'm over the yard but but it's you know you can hire

somebody I do all those things you know you're not being and I think but it's, you know, you could hire some idea of those things.

You know, you're not being, and I think so it's when we're not intentional about spending time with our spouse, listening to our spouse, doing the things that connect us, which we talk

about a lot with our spouse, then then the spouse is going to begin to think, do they really

care?

I mean, why are they even in this marriage with me?

Maybe we have sex ever so often. And so that's good, but that's not connecting us the way we're

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