Amy Sedaris 🌱🍄

Life is Short with Justin Long

Wondery

Comedy Interviews, Society & Culture, Tv & Film, Comedy

4.8 • 9.3K Ratings

🗓️ 24 September 2019

⏱️ 87 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Amy Sedaris (Strangers with Candy, At Home with Amy Sedaris) tells Justin quirky stories about some of her favorite jobs over the years, playing and learning from her godsons, and growing up in a Greek Orthodox family in the South.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey, prime members. You can listen to Life is Short. Add free on Amazon Music. Download the app today.
0:13.1	When we were kids, one of us was allergic to cats and dogs. So in order to not ostracize that one kid, my parents said we were all allergic.
0:21.4	I was kind of crushed by this because I love the idea of having a furry.
0:25.3	Yeah, I was a furry when I was a kid. A furry friend, a furry pal.
0:31.0	And so the next logical step was to get rabbits. And I remember going to the pet store to get a rabbit.
0:37.3	I brought it home, but it was hopping oddly. And I picked it up and looked underneath it and realized that it didn't have
0:44.4	fine feet. It just had these two little nubs. So I brought it back to the pet store owner and he said,
0:51.6	all right, we're going to pick out another one. And he took it kind of aggressively and tossed it into a separate bin.
0:57.6	And I said, well, what's going to happen to that one? And he said, Oh, one of the snakes is going to get lucky.
1:01.8	And so I said, well, okay, I, you know, I can't have that happen. So I said, can you at least give me a discount on it?
1:08.1	And he, he said, I'll tell you what, I'll knock off five bucks. So he gave it to me for $15 instead of 20.
1:14.2	And then right when you left the store with nubs, he went on to feed the snakes a bunch of able bodied rabbits.
1:21.5	Snakes I'd eat. They're like, this one doesn't have feet. Oh, good. This one has feet.
1:27.2	Oh, my legs are my favorite part. Really my lucky day.
1:30.5	Life could be a dream. Life could be a dream. Oh, dude, dude, dude, dude, shit.
1:38.2	You're listening to life is short. I'm your two-legged host, Justin Long.
1:42.1	Life could be a dream sweetheart. Dude, dude, dude, dude, shit.
1:48.9	And with me as always is, is Christian who also has is also a biped. Yeah. Yeah. You are a biped.
1:55.7	It's such a big both have to be biped.
2:00.4	Happy ending. I ended up having nubs for God. Right into college, like well into college. So like seven or eight years, which is long.
2:07.2	I was with you that day when you try to return nubs.
2:12.6	And do you remember when we were heading home, this is we're dating ourselves here because when we were driving home,
	...

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