Alien Queen Juno Birch Abducts Kelly Mantle!

The Kelly Mantle Show

Kelly Mantle & Studio71 & Confetti Cannon

Society & Culture, Comedy Interviews, Comedy

5.0 • 578 Ratings

🗓️ 28 May 2025

⏱️ 56 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

There's been an alien sighting right here on Earth! Yes, that's happening live on The Kelly Mantle Show! That's right...The Queen of Aliens, Juno Birch, visits Kelly Mantle in The Kelly Mantle Studio. They talk about everything from spaceships to cheese balls to encounters with Jennifer Coolidge to The Sims! And Juno's current world tour, The Probed Tour! And her daughter getting decapitated! Her engagement to an earthling. And their love of strange sounds and Pete Burns and trans rights! Tune in to this extraterrestrial experience...yes, that's happening tonight! Kelly IG: @kellymantle Kelly TikTok: @thekellymantle Juno Birch IG: @junobirch Juno Birch TikTok: @junobirch8 Produced By: @johnmarkcreative Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello, I'm Kelly Mantle.
0:03.2	Hello, I'm Kelly Mantle.
0:06.1	Hello, I'm Kelly Mantle.
0:08.8	And this is the Kelly Mantle show.
0:12.1	Won't you come inside, the Kelly Mantle studio? Do you know I never know where I am, but I always end up where I'm supposed to be?
0:32.6	Isn't that sublime?
0:36.6	The other night I was with my good duties's Katie Lang and Shania Twain.
0:41.3	We were feasting on midnight snacks which consisted of bagel bites and apple jacks,
0:46.3	and we were visited by the ghost of Jack Kerouac.
0:49.3	He came to us in the form of salt and pepper shakers,
0:53.3	and we talked about wrist takers and magic makers and groundbreaking beat makers.
0:58.8	And drums kept pounding rhythm to the brain.
1:01.8	And the beat goes on.
1:03.8	And then Brandy Carlisle showed up and serenaded us with a song.
1:08.6	And out of nowhere, I screamed, from Castro Street to Broadway,
1:12.6	from the Great Lakes to the Miami runways.
1:15.6	Queer culture reigned supreme.
1:18.6	So don't forget to dream.
1:21.6	And I look down at my bagels smothered in sour cream.
1:25.6	And I vomited.
1:30.9	Welcome to The Kelly Mantle Show.
1:34.7	Won't you come inside the Kelly Mantle studio?
	...

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