Accountable As F*ck with Teddi Mellencamp

Bitch Bible

PodcastOne

Comedy, Society & Culture

4.6 • 14.8K Ratings

🗓️ 20 March 2018

⏱️ 58 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Jackie and Real Housewife Teddi Mellencamp go in deep on Beverly Hills drama, how to drink and lose weight and what to do if you're slapped on an airplane.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	The following podcast is a deer media production.
0:10.2	Hello everybody. Happy Tuesday. I'm Jackie Shimo. Welcome to the Bitch Bible podcast.
0:17.0	I will be sitting down with Teddy Melon Camp in just a bit. I have Rose Chilled. It's not
0:23.6	Vanderpump Rose. We will hopefully be drinking it out of improper glassware because I like to test
0:30.4	people. Hopefully I'm not drinking alone. That does happen on this podcast often, which you know,
0:36.6	hey, it's just another day in the life. Before we start our interview, I would like to... Did I just
0:43.9	say interview? What am I dying, Sawyer? Like in the caves of Afghanistan? It's not an interview.
0:49.2	Whatever. Conversation, shall I say. Bitch fest. I would like to do a quick shout out to Jessica
0:57.0	Potter. Your sister wrote to me that you've had, well, just a shitty year and that you've been
1:03.8	in the hospital and you listen to the bitch Bible to keep you laughing. And I cannot thank you enough.
1:10.0	You have a really nice sister. I'm sending you lots of love and you know, it's always more fun to
1:15.5	laugh than cry. So hang in there. Get better and we'll have a martini together when you're all
1:21.9	healed. Love you lots and you know, staying in the humanitarian spirit that I just live and
1:29.5	breathe in. I want to give you guys a gift because I am the gift that keeps on giving. And when I'm
1:37.1	all done giving, I just put my nose to the grindstone and I just think, how can I give more?
1:42.8	Hashtag philanthropist. We all know that I used to shamefully dabble in stealing organic herbs
1:53.7	at the self checkout because, well, I'm shady. And organic products are fucking expensive. Like,
2:03.2	I'm sorry, I am not going to spend $15 on an organic locally sourced radish. No, it's just a
2:10.3	hard no. I just can't. Okay. So Christmas has come early. Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza, whatever
2:16.5	your style is. And I'm not joking. I swear I've read over this offer like 5,000 times because I
2:24.2	literally thought it was a typo because it seemed no offense far too generous. But here I am doing
2:31.2	the Lord's work with a very special gift for my bitch Bible listeners. I am giving you guys $60
	...

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