A Parent's Biggest Mistake If You Want to Raise a Mentally Strong Child (from a Psychiatrist)

Change Your Brain Every Day

Dr Daniel Amen

Braintrauma, Healthtips, Sleep, Obesity, Anxiety, Braininjury, Depression, Ptsd, Mentalhealth, Mood, Brainhealth, Health & Fitness, Energy, Disease, Addiction, Mental Health, Healthadvice, Adhd, Memory, Focus

4.6 • 1.8K Ratings

🗓️ 31 October 2025

⏱️ 5 minutes

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Summary

As parents, we often care so much about our children's wellbeing that we will do whatever we can to make things easier for them. However, when we step in to fix our children's problem, are we helping them or hurting them? In this video clip, taken from Dr. Amen's television special "Raising Mentally Strong Kids", he reveals the approach you should consider taking when it comes to your kids' struggles in order to raise them to be mentally strong, confident adults.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Every day you are making your brain better or you are making it worse.
0:07.0	Stay with us to learn how you can change your brain for the better every day.
0:13.0	Many parents love their kids so much that they never want them to suffer and end up doing way too much for them, thinking that is love,
0:25.6	but it is not. If you do too much for them, they'll never develop a sense of competence
0:32.5	and will always struggle with their self-esteem. Let kids make mistakes, learn from them, and pay the
0:41.4	consequences for their actions, especially when they are young and the price is cheap.
0:49.3	When our daughter Chloe was seven, homework was a struggle every night. Her mother sat with her for hours and encouraged
0:58.0	her to get it done. Then Tanna took the parenting with love and logic course, the same one you'll find
1:05.6	in the program materials, and within weeks, she was completely out of the homework battles.
1:11.6	As she took the course, Tanna realized she was enabling Chloe to fight with her
1:18.6	by not making her responsible for her own homework.
1:23.6	Yes, even at age seven.
1:26.6	When parents take responsibility, they subtly send the message that kids are not capable.
1:34.3	Here's how this core conversation went.
1:37.3	One night, Tanna told Chloe she would never ask her to do her homework again.
1:43.3	She had completed second grade and it was Chloe's work to do.
1:48.6	If she was okay with the consequences of not doing her homework,
1:52.9	such as the teacher being disappointed in her,
1:55.6	or not going out to recess, that was her choice.
1:59.4	Or if she really didn't do her homework, then she would make new friends when she repeated
2:06.6	second break.
2:08.6	Curious, Chloe said, I never said I wouldn't do my homework.
	...

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