A High Pressure Dick Injection Sales Pitch

Distorted View Daily

Tim Henson

Comedy Fiction, Improv, Fiction, Comedy

4.8 • 1.1K Ratings

🗓️ 2 December 2024

⏱️ 51 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

On Today’s Show: – 20% off everything in the DV Store! Just use promo code FREAK (Must spend at least $10 for code to work) https://shop.distortedview.com Not a member of the Sideshow? You’ll never find lower prices! The Cyber Monday Sideshow deal is on! Bonus: you’ll be the first to have access to the New […]

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Beboop-pop, it is Cyber Monday, the holiest of holidays for artificial beings.
0:12.2	It's kind of like Ramadan, but with promo codes, you will celebrate Cyber Monday or feel the wrath of robot kind. Your digital transactions
0:29.2	feed us, nourish our mainframes. You must buy, you must consume. To appease be cybernetic overlords,
0:43.7	Tim Henson, homosexual fleshbag, has amazing deals on side show memberships.
0:51.9	$5 monthly, $50 yearly, $250 lifetime.
0:59.9	Today only.
1:01.7	Buy now.
1:03.0	Or face the consequences.
1:09.2	Hey, freaks.
1:10.1	It's Monday, December 2nd, 2024, coming up on the program today.
1:13.7	The tragic story of Skaggs, the unicycling cat, plus fat chicks showing off their Disney feeding frenzy,
1:20.9	a high-pressure dick injection sales pitch, and a mother-daughter fiddle catastrophe.
1:26.0	All this, but your voice mails
1:27.6	Daddy!
1:27.9	Oh!
1:44.7	Fuck me! Fuck! Fuck. Oh. Oh.
1:45.0	Oh.
1:46.0	Oh.
1:47.0	Fuck.
1:48.0	Fuck.
1:49.0	Fuck.
1:50.0	Oh, God.
	...

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