This is Hidden Brain. I'm Shankar Vedantam. Countless times every day, people ask us what we think,

what we want, and how we feel. We tell a barista what coffee we want. We explain to co-workers

how they can help us with a project. We share with family members which movie we want to watch.

But sometimes our answers don't reveal what we really want

and our opinions don't match how we really feel.

We may stay silent when a family member says something obnoxious.

We might groan internally at a co-worker's bad joke,

but say nothing aloud. I remember an incident not long ago. I was on a Zoom call with a

group of people, and one of them said something that made me uncomfortable. But this person

clearly did not realize they were saying anything wrong, and I didn't want to jump into the

conversation and say what I really thought. Let it slide, I thought. did not realize they were saying anything wrong, and I didn't want to jump into the conversation

and say what I really thought. Let it slide, I thought. It's not a big deal.

There are plenty of scenarios where this strategy makes sense. Hiding the way we feel can serve as social lubricant. It helps keep the peace.

But what happens when such behavior multiplies beyond the individual to entire societies?

What happens when large numbers of people disagree with something that is happening,

but each of them in their own heart says,

you know what? Forget it. I'm just going to smile and go along. Even worse, what happens when large numbers of people say the opposite of what they really feel, perhaps because they are

afraid of what might happen if they spoke the truth.

I want to revisit an episode we first recorded in 2020.

It explores a phenomenon I think about often,

one that shapes our individual lives and the fate of nations.

Today on Hidden Brain, the profound repercussions of hiding how we really feel.

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