Hi, you're listening to Small Things Often from the Gottman Institute,

where we talk you through research-based tips to help improve your relationships in five minutes or less.

Today's tip is about how to share fondness and admiration, even if you're busy.

We know. You've got a lot of things on your plate. And so does your partner.

Between work, family commitments, and endless to-do lists, life can get hectic. You feel there's no way to fit

everything in. So, without even realizing it, the first thing that's put on the back burner is your relationship.

And pretty soon you start noticing things are very different. Maybe your partner always seems to

be distracted when you speak to them. And when you do talk, there always seems to be an issue.

And lovemaking? Well, that seems to be a thing of the past. And because your relationship is at the very

bottom of your priority list, you find yourself feeling more and more undervalued and alone.

Neither one of you feels important in the other's life anymore. And you even wonder if you still

love each other. If this is the case, listen up, because we've got some

ways for you to strengthen your bond, get back on track, and rediscover what you cherished in each other.

First, actively look for ways to let your partner know that they are important and valued.

No matter if your day is busy, you can always find a moment or two to

connect. For instance, give a quick caller text to your partner in the afternoon, just to see how

their day is going, and always be on the lookout to look for things your partner is doing right,

and then share your appreciation for it. Maybe they whipped up a delicious dinner before you got home from work.

Don't take it for granted.

Tell them how much you appreciated it.

Next, focus on what you cherish about each other

and share those thoughts with your partner.

...