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Kristen, CHILL OUT.

#9 Loneliness & Napping

Kristen, CHILL OUT.

Kristen Carney

Comedy

4.8672 Ratings

🗓️ 6 June 2017

⏱️ 68 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Kristen and Stevie discuss being lonely and napping with depression. They also attempt to sing Fiona Apple and Frank Sinatra, so prepare yourself.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hey, Stevie. Hey. It's mentally chill. You know what I'm going to do from now on is do mentally chill.

0:12.0

Oh, I like that. So it's more obvious that it's ill.

0:14.8

Mentally chill ill. Yeah. I think that's it from now on. It's good. Yeah. It works. That is,

0:19.3

that's the new thing. So someone wrote to me on Instagram the other day and they said, because they posted a picture

0:26.3

of like, this is my book cover if I ever had one, which I won't, because you were just saying,

0:30.3

you're lazy, I'm lazy. I'll never write a book. I'm trying to, but we'll see what happens. It's funny. I was just talking about this to Dave. Oh, really? About a book? Yeah. Oh, cool. Yeah. Well, we have a, oh, I have a title for you and a title for me. So someone

0:40.9

wrote to me and they were like, um, because my last name's Carney. They're like, it should be

0:45.4

melancharnie. Oh. I like that. Which was really good. And then for you, you're Stevie Cryin. Yes. Oh, you knew. You've heard that. I've heard that because my middle name starts with the K. And you put the K in front of Ryan. And so it's literally Stevie K. Ryan. I'm so jealous. Yeah. What's your middle name? It's so ugly. I'm named. My first name is after my dad. And's Kristen. And my middle name is after my grandmother who's Kathleen.

1:13.0

So I'm Stevie Kathleen.

1:14.6

Like, why would you throw a fucking girl name in the middle of two boy names?

1:17.3

Well, not even a girl name, like an old lady name.

1:19.7

Yeah, like an old lady like Kathleen.

1:23.0

Kathleen.

1:23.6

I feel bad for people named Kathy.

1:25.9

That's what they call my grandma, Kathy.

1:27.7

Yeah, but she's a grandma.

1:28.5

She can be Kathy.

1:29.1

Like, my grandmother is Rita.

1:30.8

She can be Rita.

1:31.6

Yeah, she was born in, like, 1935.

1:33.7

Yeah.

1:34.4

Yeah, that's like having the name, like, Bertha or Agatha or something, like, just fucked.

...

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