85: Old Clootie (The Life of St. Dunstan)

Apocrypals

Chris Sims

Comedy, History

4.9 • 650 Ratings

🗓️ 21 March 2021

⏱️ 86 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

As it is written in the Book of Ecclesiastes, Theophiloi: futility. Utter futility. That's what we get from trying to influence the farce that is Lent Madness to get our pick, St. Dunstan, all the way to the end of that sham of a tournament. In the time between deciding on him and recording this episode, our holy boy is already out, despite doing some real Hellboy stuff to the Devil his own self. Find out more in this week's episode, which is neither farce nor sham! Sometimes!

Topics of Discussion: St. Joseph's Day, the best possible Die Hard sequel, Jacobus de Voragine's strange attitude towards names, a true momacle, a bunch of people with extremely ninth century royalty names that I'm not going to write down, an attempted callout for my need to do occupy myself while I record these pdocasts, animæ, a light bit of lit crit, bad meter.

Hymnal: "Running With The Devil" by Van Halen, "Jump" by BusinessPug (https://youtu.be/X20rr5sA-Ow)

Offertory: As Enoch writes, "Whoever of you spends gold or silver for his brother's sake, he will receive ample treasure in the world to come." Support the show via http://ko-fi.com/apocrypals, or check out Official Apocrypals merchandise designed by Erica Henderson! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/apocrypals?ref_id=18246

Black Lives Matter. Trans Lives Matter. Heck 12. Isaiah 54:17.

Transcript

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0:00.0	You're listening to Apocrypal's on the Greenlit Podcast Network.
0:04.0	Check out all of our shows at greenlitpodcasts.com.
0:08.6	But the devil, which ever had great envy at him, came to him in an even tide in the likeness of a woman,
0:14.6	as he was busy to make a chalice, and with smiling, said that she had great things to tell him,
0:19.8	and then he bade her say what she would,
0:21.9	and then she began to tell him many nice trifles,
0:24.8	and no manner of virtue therein.
0:27.1	And then he supposed that she was a wicked spirit,
0:29.4	and anon caught her by the nose with a pair of tongs of iron burning hot,
0:32.9	and then the devil began to roar and cry.
0:35.4	The Life of St. Dunstan from the Golden Legend. Hello, friends and neighbors, and welcome to Apocopalus.
1:01.7	This is the podcast where two non-believers read through the Bible, but we try not to be jerks about it.
1:08.5	My name is Chris Sims.
1:09.7	With me, as always, the other set of footprints,
1:11.7	Benito Serino. Benito, happy St. Joseph's Day. Happy St. Joseph's Day to you as well. Felice
1:18.0	Dia del Padre, as they say in Spain. Did you leave your shoes out and get some baby aspirin
1:24.1	put in them by St. Joseph? Baby aspirin, fava beans.
1:30.0	Bartles and James.
1:31.7	All the classics. A hammer.
1:34.7	A piece of wood that needed to be stretched out magically.
1:38.0	When I put it out, it was four inches long.
1:40.4	And then when I woke up in the morning, it was 12 inches long.
	...

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