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Shameless Leadership

702: Work-Life Balance: A Patriarchal Social Construct That Holds Moms Back

Shameless Leadership

Sara Dean

Self-improvement, How To, Business, Management, Education

4.7800 Ratings

🗓️ 14 November 2022

⏱️ 31 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Work-life balance is a social construct. It is an idea and philosophy that is sold to women as something to be desired, something to be attained, and something to aspire to.   The myth that work-life balance can actually exist is a crappy bill of goods sold to us by the Patriarchy.   As feminism has evolved over the last few decades, we have been told, “YAY! Women can have it all.” But we have been given no resources and no support. There has been no systemic restructuring (philosophical or logistical) to shift our expected full-time household and parental contributions as we take on other societal roles.  We have been conditioned that because we can have it all, we should go after it all. And then once we go after it all and fill every millimeter and pore of our metaphorical plates, we should also keep it all balanced in some picture-perfect mathematical ratio - as if our lives are as simple as some sort of formula or squeaky clean quadratic equation.   We are told if we have better balance, we wouldn’t be so stressed out all the time.   We are told if we have better balance, we will be better moms and our kids will be more likely to thrive.   We are told we are lucky to live in an era where we can work full time (if not more) and also parent full time - cramming 48 hours of work into every 24-hour day.   Because we are told this myth is possible, we are left to feel inadequate, guilty, and resentful when we cannot figure out how to make it work.   When we are working, we feel guilty that we aren’t parenting. When we are parenting, we feel guilty that we aren’t working.   When men set aspirational goals around work-life balance and do things like, say, coach their kids' soccer team, we say, “Wow, he’s such an involved father.”   When is the last time you heard someone say, “Wow, she’s such an involved mom.” We just are. Involved, engaged, ON… 24/7.   If you feel like you don’t have a work-life balance, it’s because there is no such thing.   So, how will you make peace with this crappy bill of goods we have been sold? Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

This is the Shameless Mom Academy episode 702. Show notes for this episode, including any links

0:06.1

mentioned in the episode, can be found by going to shamelessmom.com and clicking on episode 702.

0:16.0

Welcome to the Shameless Mom Academy. I'm your host, Sarah Dean. I'm here to give you and other passionate,

0:22.3

driven, unapologetic moms, tools, resources, and a little bit of humor to help you lead more

0:28.0

positive, powerful, and purposeful lives every damn day. One of the best things about the

0:33.1

Shameless Mom Academy is our community. So be sure to join us in our free private Facebook group to connect

0:38.5

with other shameless moms just like you. You can find us over at shamelessmom.com forward slash

0:44.1

Facebook. All right. Let's dive into today's episode. Hello, Shameless moms. Happy Monday. I hope that wherever you are, you're doing well and that you are warm.

0:56.6

If you are listening in live time, it is the middle of November, and it's cold.

1:01.6

Here in Seattle, we had this unusually long fall, which was, I won't even say fall.

1:07.0

We had an unusually long summer.

1:08.7

And we literally went from 80 degrees to like 40 degrees

1:12.0

in the shortest time span ever in my life, having lived here for 43 of my 47 years. And all I can do

1:20.5

is like wrap myself on blankets trying to like, because we like missed a whole season. We missed the 60

1:25.5

degree weather. And I'm having a hard time adjusting.

1:28.2

I went into a meeting at Vinny's school the other day in a hot pink fleece sweater shirt,

1:34.1

sweatshirt situation, like real hot pink and very fleecy. And the guy my parent association co-chair,

1:41.3

who I had the meeting with, he's like, you really like

1:44.4

cozy things, don't you? And I was like, oh yes, oh yes. So for anyone else who's sitting in hot

1:50.5

pink fleece or puffy vests or cozy things, like right there with you, cheers, cheers. So I am

1:57.0

really excited for our conversation today. I should give you like a little rant warning because

2:02.5

this is going to be a little rante. And I think that some of you will appreciate that because I think

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