I would like to ask for your perspective on a matter we currently have between me and my girlfriend

of two and a half years.

So some context from the beginning we were open about family.

I have always wanted to have children while she didn't share the same desire, though

she wasn't against them either.

Now we are at a point where we have to decide how to proceed.

I recognize you would argue that this should be done at the start, and I agree.

At the time, I assumed she might eventually come to want to have children as well.

Anyway, we have been attending couples' therapy for the last four months, first to see whether

we could resolve the question of not having or having children.

Naturally, the sessions let us talk about our backgrounds, families, traumas, etc.,

which was all hugely helpful to both of us.

Yesterday, not yesterday, but it was like three weeks ago.

At the therapy, it was the hardest session for me.

I'm still going over it in my mind, but essentially it was said at the session that I did not

truly choose my girlfriend for who she is, but rather

because of my wish to have children.

What was then said was that for a husband, a wife should be before everything else, and children

should be a byproduct of that love.

Then she went so that she said,

if a man would not want to stay with his woman,

even without children, he does not truly love her.

...