603: The Bus That Couldn't Remember His Name

Regular Features

Comedy

4.9 • 546 Ratings

🗓️ 12 September 2025

⏱️ 34 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Take a little pinch of Regular, and a heaped teaspoon of Features. Pre-heat the oven. Sorry I was supposed to tell you to do that first. Unpinch the Regular and tip the Features back into the Feature Scuttle. Now that your hands are free, pre-heat the oven. Okay. Now you can repinch the Regular, add a heaped teaspoon of Features. Hold on. There was supposed to be greaseproof paper somewhere. Sorry. In this episode, Joe introduces us to Rumplestiltskin's weird brother. Log clears out a gay bar using the power of words. And Steve is back with a critically acclaimed sequel in the Brian Cradle sagaverse. Please love us!! "Volatile Reaction" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ "Touching Moments Four - Melody" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Transcript

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0:00.0	Regular regular regular features.
0:01.9	A regular regular regular features.
0:04.0	A regular regular features.
0:05.0	A regular regular features.
0:07.0	Hello and welcome to regular features, the podcast where I've got something in my throat.
0:12.0	Get that right out.
0:14.1	It's better now.
0:15.2	Log, Steve, anything in your throats?
0:17.6	Let me check.
0:19.0	Oh, hello.
0:19.9	Get it out.
0:20.6	A small smooth pebble that just skipped effortlessly, slithy, across a nearby lake.
0:26.2	Logg.
0:26.6	Beautiful.
0:27.4	Recording as ever on the shore.
0:29.9	I this week have a feature about a little known goblin and his big old law.
0:37.2	Log, what you got? A bart bartender i've heard goblins
0:41.0	have fat law fat law baby oh flop it up because i got fat law sometimes i think you don't even want
0:49.9	to know what my feature is well i couldn't say the thing about the fat law once you'd start. That would have been a brilliant callback, actually. If you're done it halfway through the episode, the people who got the reference would have fucking loved it. That would have been really great if you hadn't said that just now. I just feel minimized and diminished because I was just about to tell you what my feature is. And you were having fun without me, basically, in a different room.
1:13.1	What's your feature all about, Long?
1:14.5	My feature is that I'm a petty little horrible, small man, I'm a small man.
1:20.4	But I make my voice big.
	...

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