Okay, shall we go from the back end of the tail to the front or the front to the back?

See, everyone asks me how they should tell their story when I have no idea what the story is.

So I'm going to just have to tell you that it's your choice.

Okay, I'll start at the back of the story.

And I'm going to be a bit embarrassed because now on the cold light of day,

what I tell you these things? It's embarrassing how

naive and pathetic I've been, frankly. So, look, I'm a 51-year-old single dad. We've spoken

before, and your help was unbelievable in reuniting with two of my three daughters. So thank you

for that. I have three months, yep, I have three months ago broken up and gone no contact with a woman

I met online, long distance relationship, and we were in that long distance relationship

for six months, and I would have hoped after three months I should be feeling a lot of relief and no more ruminations.

Please God tell me it's not an Asian woman.

No, not an Asian woman.

Oh, just because I've had so many calls lately about guys with Asian women and problems.

Okay, good.

I'm glad to break the cliche and break the cycle.

Okay, go ahead.

Well, South American, shall I say generally.

I can't really name the exact country, can I?

No, that's fine.

Or can I?

Yeah, so is the South American?

...