56: Welcome to the Bone Zone (The Book of Ezekiel, Part Two)

Apocrypals

Chris Sims

Comedy, History

4.9 • 650 Ratings

🗓️ 26 January 2020

⏱️ 68 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Welcome back, Theophiloi, to the truly disconcerting rantings of the hair-throwing, scroll-eating mad lad himself, Ezekiel! In this episode, we go to extremes, as Ezekiel offers up the most brütal horror movie prophecies for the iniquitous nations, and then takes a hard right turn into intensely specific blueprints for his visionary construction project. If you've ever wanted to know how prophets make their money, this is the episode that reveals all.

Topics of discussion: Lent Creep, the Florence Y'alls, God's vengeance on Jerry "The King" Lawler, that one Bass Pro Shop, Maximum Carnage, Chambers (the second Negan), the Biblical prophecies of Super Mario Bros. 3, this extremely dope Spider-Man page, Ezekiel's #sponsored #content.

Hymnal: "Spooky Scary Skeletons Remix" by The Living Tombstone; "Lay All Your Love On Me" by Stephen Mann of English Martyrs Church (https://www.youtube.com/user/Principal45).

Offertory: If you have been given riches, wealth, and honor so that you lack nothing of all you desire for yourself, let a stranger enjoy them via ko-fi.com/apocrypals.

Transcript

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0:00.0	You're listening to Apocrapal's, part of the Greenlit Podcast Network. Check out greenlitpodcast.com for more information and other great shows.
0:08.4	I will put your flesh on the mountains and fill the valleys with your carcass. I will drench the land with the flow of your blood, even to the mountains. The ravines will be filled with your gore. When I snuff you out, I will cover the heavens and darken the stars.
0:21.5	I will cover the sun with a cloud and the moon will not give its light. I will darken all the
0:25.8	shining lights in the heavens over you and will bring darkness on your land. This is the
0:30.6	declaration of the Lord God. The book of Ezekiel, chapter 32, verses 5 through 8.
0:53.6	Spooky, scary, sky. of Ezekiel, chapter 32, verses 5 through 8. Hello, friends and neighbors, and welcome to Apocry Pals.
0:56.9	It's the podcast where two nonbelievers read through the Bible and we try not to be jerks about it.
1:00.9	My name is Chris Sims and with me as always is the other set of footprints.
1:05.4	Benito Serrano. Benito, how are you today?
1:08.4	I'm crushing it today. I'm crushing it like the Lord is going to crush tire and sidelon.
1:14.6	Yeah, we're both doing really great, having a couple of real solid times with our perfectly normal functioning brains.
1:24.7	That's right, having a real normal one. Just having very normal reactions to
1:30.3	things. Yeah, absolutely. We're having a real normal one over here. How are you? Yeah. Everyone,
1:37.2	please respond aloud to your podcast app of choice. And we will hear it through the powers of prophecy.
1:45.3	Speaking of the powers of property, yeah.
1:47.2	We have some fun stuff to get through, as you might have heard at the top of the show,
1:51.6	because we are doing the second half of the Buck Wild ranting prophecies of Ezekiel,
1:59.8	who you may remember as the absolute scroll-eating mad lad
2:02.9	who was throwing his hair around everybody.
2:05.2	That's right.
2:06.0	We have some real fun stuff,
2:07.8	and then we have some real other stuff in this one.
	...

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