Regular regular, regular, regular features, a regular regular, regular features, a regular regular features.

Hello and welcome to the Regular Features podcast, the podcast that's exactly the same every week. And like every week, I'm Steve Hoggerton, joined by my two best friends, Joe and Log, Joe, say a thing now. Hi, I'm Joe, and I've not done one of these

for almost a month, and I felt out of practice before we started, but you guys came in with a

couple of features that made me remember what it is to be feature man. That's very touching, actually. It's really good. Log... No, it's a good podcast, actually. Were you touched? Sorry, Joe, shut up. Okay. Log. I'm waiting to be talked to directly, so I can introduce myself. I've addressed you twice, Log. You said you did not say my name. Well, you just did. Oh, yeah. Oh, dang. I was asking if you were touched by Joe's comments about how he'd forgotten what it was like to love until he came back on the podcast, which I think is what he said. I think I have just forgotten what it's like to love you to. Oh, my God too until one of you does a little kissy mouth at your monitors

and makes me remember what it's like to be loved.

Do it, do it, do a little kissy face?

Steve, stop putting your fingers under your nose like you're disgusted at me.

He thinks you stink.

Oh, no.

Well, I'll tell you what, I'm willing to make a unilateral declaration of love to you two

Because I've loved you my whole life and I will never start loving you

We both just did the kissy faces and you weren't even looking

You were looking at your crotch when you were talking about how much you loved us

And I can see you are visibly aroused

I shouldn't have stood up in front of my wed cam.

I'm so sorry.

Wed cam.

You've got to marry us with your wed cam.

What's your feature log?

I've met Helen upon Helen, and I'm going to bring that Helen to you.

They sound like Helen Degenerates.

Joe?

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