Hello, Stephan, I'm a fairly new local subscriber and new to your work in general.

As of late, I've become more aware of just how much my poor upbringing has affected me.

My parents divorced when I was 13 years old and I'm now 23.

I'm the youngest child of three and throughout my childhood that was neglected, verbally abused,

and most of the time not taken seriously. My older brother and I didn't have an actual relationship

until a few years ago, due to our poor parenting. We weren't very close in childhood

in our teen years and would often not get along as kids. As a result my parents

abuse and neglect I've been struggling with my identity, social connections, confrontation, and various

coping mechanisms that have built up for myself when I was a child.

From the ages of 13 to 21, I struggled heavily with anxiety and began to use weed alcohol nicotine food

pornography pornography humor and nihilism and sex as coping mechanisms and

for a long time I would create fantasies in my mind as if I was someone else and if I am remembering correctly

that was one of my first coping mechanisms. For around two years now I've been struggling with

a so far undiagnosed chronic bladder issue and I'm also wondering if the stress from my

adolescents has anything to do with my condition.

I only began to fully try and better myself in 2022 but I found there are still so many

stumbling blocks in front of me. I feel exhausted from the trauma and the result of it as well as my poor health.

I feel that I'm constantly failing to be the person I want to slash need to be and instead I am being the person my parents set me up to be.

Yeah, that's a tough tale and I sympathize.

Do you want to start with childhood stuff?

Yeah, I could start from there for sure.

So I think, you know know my memory is a bit is a bit shoddy and I apologize in advance for this

...