#540: How to Be a More Compelling Person

The Art of Manliness

Society & Culture, Education, Philosophy

4.7 • 14.5K Ratings

🗓️ 4 September 2019

⏱️ 54 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

We all know people who have a certain magnetism and charisma. What is it exactly that makes them so compelling? My guest today explores that question in his book Compelling People: The Hidden Qualities That Make People Influential, and primarily locates the answer in two such hidden qualities: strength and warmth. His name is Matthew Kohut and today on the show he explains why it is we find the combination of strength and warmth so attractive in others, and how we can cultivate these traits ourselves, including in the way we dress, carry ourselves, and talk. Matt then gives advice on how to display strength and warmth in different situations we might find ourselves in, from acing a job interview to managing a crisis at work. We end our conversation with that most perennial question of body language: what to do with your hands when you speak. Get the show notes at aom.is/compellingpeople.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Brett McKay here and welcome to another edition of the Art of Manliness Podcast.
0:11.1	We all know people have a certain magnetism and charisma.
0:13.8	What is it exactly that makes them so compelling?
0:15.9	My guess to explore is that question in his book, compelling people, hidden qualities that
0:19.6	make people influential, and primarily locates the answer in two such hidden qualities,
0:24.0	strength and warmth.
0:25.0	His name is Matthew Kohat, and today on the show, he explains why it is we find the combination
0:28.9	of strength and warmth so attractive in others and how we can cultivate those traits ourselves,
0:33.2	including the way we dress, carry ourselves and talk.
0:35.8	Matt then gives advice on how to display strength and warmth in different situations we
0:39.4	might find ourselves in from facing a job interview to managing a crisis at work.
0:43.2	We enter a conversation with that most perennial question of body language.
0:46.7	What do you do with your hands when you speak?
0:49.2	As it shows over, check out our show notes at aam.islash of compelling people.
0:58.9	Matthew Kohat, welcome to the show.
1:05.3	Thanks for having me.
1:07.0	You are the co-author of a book called, Compelling People, the Hidden Qualities that Make
1:11.1	Us Influential.
1:12.8	What got you started researching?
1:14.5	What makes compelling people compelling?
1:16.6	My co-author, John Neffen, Jiren Eye and a third partner, Seth Pendleton, came to this
1:22.4	through politics.
	...

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