540 - Banish the Ghost of Relationships Past

Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships

Multiamory, LLC

Sexuality, Self-improvement, Relationships, Health & Fitness, Society & Culture, Education

4.9 • 935 Ratings

🗓️ 29 July 2025

⏱️ 65 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

This week we're bringing back a remastered episode about the ghosts of relationships past...and getting into a good relationship after being in a bad one. Do you have trouble trusting a good relationship? Are you always waiting for the other shoe to drop and things to turn bad? You might be suffering from relationship PTSD, which can inhibit your ability to enjoy a good, healthy relationship. Particularly if you have a history of past abusive, manipulative, controlling, or coercive, you can have trouble being present and open with a current partner. We're going to be diving into how relationship trauma can influence our present relationships, healthy behaviors that can seem destabilizing after a poor relationship, and some actionable ways you can help yourself heal and receive the love that's currently in front of you. Join Dedeker and Orit Krug for our polyamory somatic retreat in northern Spain (September 22-25, 2025) - sliding scale pricing available, use code MULTI when you apply at www.multiamory.com/retreat.Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.supercast.com. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community.Practice love every day with Paired, the #1 app for couples. Download the app at paired.com/MULTI.,Get 10% off sexual health supplements at vb.health with promo code MULTI.Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com. We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello, multiamery folks and friends. Let's go to Spain together. That's right, Orit Krug and I are hosting a
0:07.2	somatic retreat, especially for polyamorous folks that's going to be in beautiful northern Spain
0:13.2	from September 22nd to the 25th, 2025. We're going to be spending four days together in a beautiful
0:20.6	natural setting, and Orit and I are going to guide you through somatic practices that can help shift long-held patterns and help you develop some powerful tools for navigating non-monogamy with more ease and confidence.
0:34.0	We handle all the details so that you can be fully present. Your accommodations are taken care of. You don't have to clean or cook. All your meals are taken care of. We really want people to feel as cared for as possible. You're welcome to come solo or to bring a partner or to bring all of your partners. Everybody is welcome. We also offer sliding scale pricing, and if
0:55.9	cost is a concern for you, please don't let that stop you from applying. We're happy to explore
1:00.3	options that work for you and for your financial situation. So we already have people signing up
1:06.7	for this one, which is nuts. We do have limited spots. So if you're interested, go to
1:11.9	multi-amory.com slash retreat. To apply today, mention the Multiamary podcast when you apply. Again,
1:18.2	that's multi-amry.com slash retreat. And I hope that I can see you in Spain. On this episode of the
1:25.2	multi-amry podcast, we're talking about the ghost of relationships
1:29.0	past. So let's just imagine that you have hit the jackpot relationship-wise. You found a really,
1:37.4	really good person to be in a relationship with. There's mutual respect, there's good communication,
1:43.8	hopefully they're really, really kind to you,
1:45.8	and you can imagine a future where the two of you grow closer and grow more intimate.
1:53.2	But you're having a really hard time trusting that the relationship is actually good,
2:00.2	even though you might have a ton of evidence right in
2:02.7	front of you that they are a good person, you're still feeling hypervigilant. You're still waiting
2:07.7	for the other shoe to drop. You're still waiting for things to turn bad. You're waiting for
2:13.0	them to hurt you or reject you or pull the rug out from under you in some way. If that sounds like you,
2:22.0	you might be struggling with past relationship PTSD. You might essentially be haunted by a ghost
2:30.2	or several ghosts of relationships past, especially if you have a history that involved an abusive
	...

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