#508: Saving Them Won't Save You

The Mark Groves Podcast

Mark Groves

Society & Culture, Relationships

4.9 • 5K Ratings

🗓️ 20 April 2026

⏱️ 52 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Here's what nobody wants to hear: the relationship you keep ending up in isn't bad luck - it's a pattern, and patterns have origins. In this episode, I'm unpacking the "problem and fixer" dynamic, how your childhood attachment wounds quietly write the script for who you're attracted to, and why being needed can feel so much like being loved when really, it's a wound in disguise. We get into how deception and narcissistic patterns hook the part of you that learned to earn love through overgiving and why real healing doesn't start with fixing yourself, it starts with stopping the story that you're broken. This is a call to take radical responsibility for the places you've abandoned yourself, grieve the original pain that keeps you chasing what you never received, and finally build the discernment and boundaries that don't just change your relationships, they change you. Resources: Get My Book! Liberated Love - Release Codependent Patterns and Create the Love You Desire: https://markgroves.com/book —Explore My Courses: https://markgroves.com/courses Follow me and my work here: —Subscribe to my YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/markgrovestv —Subscribe to my Substack: https://markgroves.substack.com —Instagram - @createthelove: https://www.instagram.com/createthelove —Facebook - @createthelove: https://www.facebook.com/createthelove Have A Question?—Have a Question For Mark That You’d Like To Hear Answered on the Podcast? Leave us a Voice Note Here: https://www.speakpipe.com/TheMarkGrovesPodcast If you want to dive deeper into Mark’s content, search through every episode, find specific topics we’ve covered, and ask him questions, go to his Dexa page: https://ask.markgroves.com Drop us a note at podcast@markgroves.com for sponsor product support, questions, comments, guest suggestions, or just to say hello! This episode is sponsored by: Cozy Earth: Use code CHANGE for 20% off sitewide at http://www.cozyearth.com

Transcript

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0:00.0	Get ready for this stat that's going to rock your socks.
0:03.4	Okay, from a University of Sussex study, they found that reading for just six minutes can reduce stress levels by up to 68%.
0:10.6	It lowers your heart rate and eases muscle tension, and it was more effective than other relaxation techniques like listening to music, drinking tea, or going for a walk.
0:20.4	Now, add to that that there's something about language that is necessary for brain health.
0:25.8	It's like going to the gym for your brain.
0:27.5	And if we even go deeper than this, there's an absolute crisis of meaning that's happening
0:32.7	for us because we're so entrenched in things like Chad GBT and our phones that we're missing the
0:39.0	essential moments of our life. We're missing deep, important connections. And if you're not
0:45.0	bored, you can't marinate and think and dream and get hit by the intuitive messages from
0:52.2	your soul, from God, from the universe, whatever
0:54.3	you want to call it, that direct your life, that allow you to feel the things that you
0:58.5	need to feel in order to decide what you want to do and what you want to move towards and what
1:03.6	you want to move away, including people and choices.
1:06.6	So I'm doing two things at once.
1:09.1	I'm starting a book club on Substack.
1:11.7	And we are reading a literal book called The Meaning of Your Life by Arthur Brooks,
1:17.3	who I recently had on the podcast.
1:18.7	So we are both going to be exploring meaning and how to create it in our lives.
1:23.7	And we're also going to get to hang out every week for four weeks starting April 14th.
1:28.7	So if you're like, wait, what? This sounds amazing. We're going to do a live Zoom call every Tuesday.
1:33.9	So we get to connect, we get to read, and we get to write, and we get to create meaning. It doesn't
1:40.8	get better in this. So if this sounds like something you're interested in,
	...

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