This is self-work, and I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford.

At self-work, we discuss psychological and emotional issues and what you can do about them,

whether that's learning self-acceptance, taking action, or seeking therapy or treatment.

Eight years ago, I extended the walls of my practice to reach those of you who might already be

knowledgeable about middle health treatment, but also to those of you who might say you'd never

darken the door of a therapist. And yet, you are here. I'll answer your questions while I invite

you to take a few minutes for

your own self-work. Say you believe that the world isn't safe anymore. You'd immediately

interpret a younger man shoving an older one as confirmation of that lack of safety, and you'd

run quickly back into your house. That's what happens so often.

We tend to leap into the belief that confirmed what we already believe. So you don't grow,

you don't stay curious. Welcome to this week's edition of Self-Work. Are you judgmental?

Many of us would quickly say no to that question, but how many people

do you know one thing about and one thing only, and you categorize them as bad or good, weak or strong,

smart, or just dumb? It doesn't take long for us to form an opinion. The studies I looked at and

quickly judged if I thought they were worthy

reported a time less than 27 seconds and some reported 7 to 10 seconds. That's not long. Don't

get me wrong. They are obvious situations such as one where there's the possibility of harm

where quick judgments are necessary and very helpful.

But what about the kind of judgment that you make because of your own biases,

your own beliefs or quick decisions about what kind of person someone is when the only thing you know is that they're different than you?

You might say things like, I wouldn't be caught dead wearing that,

...