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Shameless Sex

#468 Power, Pleasure, and the Men Who Want More

Shameless Sex

Amy Baldwin

Education, Sexuality, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness

4.43K Ratings

🗓️ 13 January 2026

⏱️ 72 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In this episode, we’re joined by Ashley Randall, also known as Irreverent Femme—a Los Angeles–based Sex, Intimacy, and Kink Coach, Dominatrix, and erotic parfum-ist. Ashley shares how her journey into sexuality work emerged from a desire to help people shed shame, reconnect with their bodies, and access deeper intimacy and pleasure. Ashley primarily works with cisgender, predominantly straight men, many of whom are successful yet disconnected—from their emotions, their desire, and their partners. She explains why working with a confident, sexually embodied woman can be both confronting and profoundly healing, offering men a space to drop performance and explore authenticity. The most common issue Ashley sees is disconnection, often showing up as performance anxiety, erectile challenges, or difficulty leading and communicating sexually. Beneath it all is a longing for confidence, presence, and deeper connection. In early sessions, Ashley focuses on nervous system regulation, consent, and embodiment, gradually guiding clients toward more grounded desire, emotional intimacy, and conscious power. We also explore Ashley’s work as a Dominatrix and how dominance—whether kinky or not—is about presence, responsibility, and attunement rather than control. She shares practical insights for men who want to be more dominant, emphasizing self-regulation, listening, and clarity. Plus, we dive into Ashley’s erotic perfumes, which she uses as a powerful sensory and somatic tool in sessions to anchor desire, memory, and arousal. Ashley leaves listeners with one golden reminder: your desire is not a problem—it’s information. Learn more or work with Ashley at www.irreverentcoaching.com Follow her on Instagram: @IrreverentLoveCoaching Do you love us? Do you REALLY love us? Then order ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠our book⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ now! Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠shamelesssex.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to snag your copy Support Shameless Sex by sending us gifts via our ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Amazon Wish List⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Other links: Get Erika Lust's beautiful , connected, ethical, and SUPER HOT porn at ⁠⁠⁠http://erikalust.com⁠⁠⁠, and use code SHAMELESS to get 45% off! Get 15% off taking care of YOU in the New Year + any annual membership at ⁠http://masterclass.com/shameless⁠ Get 10% off + free shipping with code SHAMELESS on Uberlube AKA our favorite lubricant at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://uberlube.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get 10% off while learning the art of pleasure at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://OMGyes.com/shameless⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get 15% off all of your sex toys with code SHAMELESSSEX at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://purepleasureshop.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Transcript

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0:00.0

So many men are straight men are conditioned to, you know, not actually speak what they're feeling,

0:04.5

not have emotional intimacy, not be vulnerable. And so I get to be a practice partner with them

0:09.3

and helping them understand that and actually have connect, like have even deeper connection

0:13.8

and practice sessions with me so then they can carry it into their lives.

0:20.5

I'm Amy. I'm April. Certified sex educators, sex experts of the year, and best-selling authors.

0:27.4

And we're on a mission to help you have more spicy, connected, and amazing shameless sex.

0:33.5

Welcome to the shameless sex revolution.

0:36.5

We're so close. It's like we have our own language. We're making sex and relationships. Welcome to the shameless sex revolution.

0:44.3

To learn more, go to shameless sex.

0:52.0

And for 15% off some of our favorite sex toys, use code shameless sex at pure pleasure shop.com.

0:55.1

You were listening to a pleasure podcast.

1:00.6

For more from our sex podcast collective, visit pleasurepodcasts.com.

1:02.5

Well, hello, everyone.

1:04.8

And isn't it weird?

1:07.2

April's not here to say something and respond.

1:09.4

April, nothing bad happened.

1:14.5

April is in Los Angeles at a pleasure products trade show and respond. April, nothing bad happened. April is in Los Angeles at a pleasure products trade show and her laptop died. Imagine that. If you've ever been to a trade show and you know and you're

1:20.2

working in a trade show, you know what that means. So she wanted to be here. She's not here.

1:25.4

We were going to be recording this online and that's not

1:28.8

happening. So we send you our love chip and good luck to you. She tried. She went into the Apple

1:34.0

store and they're like, we can get it to you in five days. So anyhow, holding it down from

1:40.0

Santa Cruz. And while I love April to be here for this introduction, I feel very honored to be

...

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