Howdy folks, welcome back to the podcast. Katie, are you excited to start talking today, to start

talking about leaving and cleaving? I am. I, Elisha was sitting in the living room and he was like,

okay, so what do you think about responding to this question from a listener? And I was like,

yes, I feel like this is so important and it has so many ramifications. And I'm so grateful that you reached out and thought to ask. Because we have personal experience with this. Early on in our marriage and ongoing. I think this is a really important thing to protecting the unity and the intimacy and the sacredness of your marriage while

also still honoring your family. And so it is kind of a delicate balance to strike.

Yeah, I think loyalty is one of those things that the sentiment might not be immediate.

But I think the like you need to at least logically, like in your brain,

shift your loyalty when you get married to your spouse. And then, you know, we, with so many

areas of our life, we really need to let, we can't let our emotion lead our behavior. We

needed to, you know, do the right thing and trust that the emotion will follow. And usually it does. It doesn't always, but I think you do the right thing and then hopefully sentiment follows, right? Mood follows action, as we often say. And so when you know something's the right thing to do, you shouldn't sit around waiting for, waiting to feel like it. You should just do it. And then eventually you will feel the sentiment there. But yeah, I mean, I'll do when to read this? Yeah, that'd be awesome. That'd be great. Says, hey, I'd love to hear your take on shifting family loyalty once you get married. I got married about six months ago and have really struggled with the idea of my main loyalty being to my husband now instead of my family of origin. I'm very close with my parents

and brother and feel very sad about the idea of my loyalty to them changing at all. As people who

are both close to your families as well, how did you handle that transition when you first got

married? And what advice would you give to a newlywed struggling with this? Thank you.

Wow. Yeah. First off, I do want to link, this is like a little bit off topic, but your parents' newlywed retreat

is coming up here in a couple of months. And we cannot, I cannot recommend that highly enough.

That is just, it's been so instrumental in our marriage and I know it's impacted just countless other

couples that we know personally. And a ton of our listeners have gone through it too. A lot of you

guys have, which is really cool. Yeah. And so I mean, I just think questions like this really get

addressed at the newlywed retreat. And so we'll link that below because I think it's, you know,

it's really for like when you're in your first two years of marriage, I believe.

That's who this conference is geared towards. But anyways, cannot recommend that highly enough.

Yeah, for us, I do think that we both had our own unique experience with this.

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