I came this close. I was the GOP Golden Boy, the Great Hope. I've got connections and ins and outs. I was on the cusp, but I just couldn't engage voters. I didn't have that cult of personality thing, I guess.

It's hard connecting with people in a genuine way. I know. And I tried everything. Believe me, I hammered the race thing. I hammer the gender thing, the trans thing, the border thing, the homeless thing, the war thing, the election thing, the abortion thing, the climate thing.

Thing about induction stoves, Israel, library books, vaccines, pronouns, socialism, BLM, CRT, the CDC, DEI, 5G, everything.

All of it I did, nobody, just nothing.

People are just numb these days, I don't know why.

TBTL.

First of all, I'd like to see the chef face to face.

These are the best Cajun chicken niblets I've ever had.

Hey, this is Sergeant Morgan down at the precinct.

We got a report that a guy in a hot dog suit was running a mok south of cheese

and heard you guys might know something about that.

Give us a call back.

You don't have to make rude noises.

That's all right. I don't mind.

I like not having fun.

I like your idea of fun.

Our idea of fun. I like not having that.

Are you even listening to our story?

Yes.

Well, listen to this.

We have a story to tell.

So listen.

...