#462: How People-Pleasing Is Killing Your Relationships with Dr. Robert Glover

The Mark Groves Podcast

Mark Groves

Relationships, Society & Culture

4.9 • 5K Ratings

🗓️ 7 July 2025

⏱️ 83 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

In this episode, Dr. Robert Glover—author of No More Mr. Nice Guy—joins Mark Groves to dismantle the "Nice Guy" syndrome and expose how covert contracts, people-pleasing, and hidden agendas sabotage intimacy and personal power. Together, they dive deep into the emotional conditioning that keeps men disconnected from their truth and trapped in performative masculinity. Dr. Glover shares unapologetic wisdom on boundaries, self-ownership, and how to reclaim your masculinity without losing your heart. Whether you're a recovering Nice Guy or love one, this episode is a roadmap to authenticity, freedom, and truly connected relationships. Dr. Robert Glover is a therapist, mentor, and author focusing on men’s relationships, health, success, and sexuality. With over 40 years of professional experience, he has authored four books, including the groundbreaking, No More Mr. Nice Guy. Dr. Glover is the founder of Integration Nation, an international community for men. Links: Website: drglover.com Integration Nation Men’s Group: integrationnation.net/landing-page Youtube: @Integration_Nation Instagram: + @drgloverofficial + @integration_nation This episode is sponsored by: —Cozy Earth: Use code MARK for 40% off sitewide at http://www.cozyearth.com —Saily: Get an exclusive 15% discount on Saily data plans! Use code MARKGROVES at checkout. Download Saily app or go to https://saily.com/markgroves —Have a question For Mark to answer on the podcast?https://www.speakpipe.com/TheMarkGrovesPodcast —Have a question for Mark and want an immediate answer? Mark's Dexa page: https://ask.markgroves.com —How to Stop Chasing Unavailable People: https://markgroves.com/stopchasing - Subscribe to Mark’s Substack to receive his weekly reflections and insights straight from his heart to your inbox. https://markgroves.substack.com/ —Contact us at podcast@markgroves.com for sponsor product support, questions, comments, or just to say hello! Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to another episode of the Mark Groves podcast. There's been this, man, it feels like,
0:07.4	many-decade conversation about what it means to be a nice guy and the toxicity of nice guys,
0:15.0	and nice guys finish last. I think this conversation is actually really important in the context of men,
0:23.0	you know, because there is a large conversation about men being more avoidant. And I think if you
0:28.2	look at the research and the history of that, that's true. That makes sense from a socialization
0:33.6	perspective, etc. But it seems to be that there is a shift happening. And I've heard this from
0:41.8	lots of people that, you know, maybe because of the conversations about gender roles and more
0:47.9	women, you know, graduating with degrees and being the primary breadwinners, etc. There's a lot of
0:53.8	shifting in how we arrange relationally. etc. There's a lot of shifting in how we arrange
0:55.6	relationally. And there's also a lot of conversation about women and men switching spots in
1:02.1	terms of women actually becoming more avoidant and men being more anxious. Now, the context and
1:07.9	subject of today's conversation with a world-renowned expert in the space of men.
1:14.4	And his book, and his name is Robert Glover, his book, No More Mr. Nice Guy, had a profound impact on me.
1:22.0	One of my favorite quotes from him is that if you don't stand up to her, she doesn't believe you'll stand up for her.
1:31.8	And I think that's a really powerful quote, that if you don't stand up to her, she won't believe you'll stand up for her.
1:39.8	And this idea that if we don't have a backbone, if we don't stand in our truth, then people won't
1:46.0	trust us because innately we won't be trustworthy and this is where we unconsciously test people
1:51.6	in relationship. Now, regardless of whether you're a man or a woman or you date men or women,
1:58.5	the pathology of what makes someone become a quote-unquote nice guy or nice girl,
2:04.6	but the things that shape each gender culturally will be quite different or maybe from like
2:12.3	movies and books and, you know, whatever it might be.
2:16.6	If we're growing up in religious places, the country
	...

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