#4527 The World’s Longest Dad Joke

TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

TBTL

Leisure, Comedy

4.8 • 2.3K Ratings

🗓️ 7 August 2025

⏱️ 43 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Andrew saw a concerning post on Bluesky that has him worried about the future of his favorite thermostat. He and Luke also check-in on the TBTL voicemail line again, where they have messages concerning old coots at baseball games and the dangers of parents explaining swear words to their kids.

Transcript

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0:00.0	It was the bottom of the fifth quarter and the baskets were loaded.
0:03.4	It was me versus the Boston Celtics basketball team.
0:06.7	Ready to lose again?
0:08.2	I said to La James Braun.
0:09.9	He was sweaty and out of breath.
0:11.9	Please give me another chance.
0:13.9	He said sexily.
0:15.5	It's basketball time.
0:17.2	I yelled in a booming voice.
0:19.1	Then I did a layup, which is different than slam dunking. It's where
0:22.5	you throw the basketball in the hoop when you're really close to it. I was too quick for them.
0:26.9	I was dribbling all over the field and the Boston Celtic said, wow, she doesn't even double
0:31.5	dribble, something I know about. Just then, Seth Curry did a humongous jump and tried to block
0:37.4	me from the basketball hoop,
0:39.0	but I threw the basketball so hard it went straight through his chest and into the hoop.
0:43.4	But he was okay and didn't die.
0:46.0	The basketball went in so good that I got a hundred points and won the game.
0:50.0	Can we please be your boyfriends now? said the Baltimore Celtics.
0:54.2	Sorry, that was a deal.
0:55.8	You can only be my boyfriends if you beat me in a game of hoop ball.
0:58.8	I said, winkingly.
1:00.3	Then they all cried.
	...

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