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TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

#4525 Big Pinchers Keep On Pinching

TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

TBTL

Leisure, Comedy

4.82.3K Ratings

🗓️ 5 August 2025

⏱️ 30 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In their ongoing efforts to listen to every message on their voicemail line, Luke and Andrew delve into Tens’ garbage anxiety (and the anxiety of their trash collectors.) Andrew also accidentally flirts with a listener.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Does anybody got a pill speaker? We need to get some boom, boom, pow!

0:04.0

In here!

0:05.0

Joe, aren't you a music guy?

0:07.0

Uh, I actually teach middle school choir.

0:10.0

I wish I was pulling down six figures like you though.

0:13.0

Stecking dough, you know what I mean?

0:15.0

I'm actually saving up right now so I could buy this plane.

0:18.0

Believe it or not, I've never been on an airplane before. Yo, I can't even process that. Jimmy! I need a brusky like my mama needs a kidney. How's she doing, by the way? She's hanging in there. Yeah, all you can do, man. TBTL. Hey, you know if we knocked down that wall, it would really open the place up.

0:40.3

You know, clean up the blood, maybe add some French doors, maybe a ping pong table right there.

0:45.3

You know, I'm just ripping.

0:47.3

Is there, and I'm just guessing here, some kind of medication that you maybe need a lot of and have taken none of, or maybe too much out today. Mmm. Ah. Gispacho soup just burned my lips. The gazpacho? Yeah, it's been sitting out. It warmed up. It warmed up so much that it burned your lip. Let me explain something to you. If you're expecting something ice cold and you bring it up to your lips and it's room temp, it's going to feel like your mouse on fire. It's going to feel like your body's on fire. And boom goes to dynamite. I could really use a win here. Well, all right. Hello. Good morning and welcome everyone to a Tuesday edition of TBTL, the show that just might be too beautiful to live. Get out of here, you flies.

1:28.1

My name's Luke Burbank.

1:29.3

I am your host.

1:30.0

You're like the Daniel Day Lewis of only doing one thing.

1:32.7

Hey, come on now.

1:33.7

Wait, I chose that audio drop.

1:34.9

All right, it's fine.

1:36.5

It's probably true.

1:39.0

The one thing I do is bring you episodes sequentially.

1:42.2

And I'm going to do that right now by bringing you episode

1:44.7

4,500 and 25 in a collector series. Let the fun begin. And what we're going to do for another day

1:52.3

is continue to listen through and enjoy. I don't want us to feel like work, like it's some kind of a

...

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