447. Coaching Hotline: Frustration with Kids, Two Flavors
UnF*ck Your Brain: Feminist Self-Help for Everyone
Kara Loewentheil
4.6 • 5.5K Ratings
🗓️ 9 December 2025
⏱️ 11 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Playing with your preschooler should be fun, right? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions that dig into common parenting frustrations. The first tackles how to show up authentically when your preschooler's bossiness during play triggers irritation. The second explores managing all those thoughts about how children "should" behave. You'll learn practical ways to reframe your irritation, understand what being "authentic" really means in parenting, and get curious about those inherited beliefs about how kids should act.
Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline
Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/447
Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/
Mentioned in this episode:
Are You Ready to Live A Confident Life?
Join me for my brand new program, A Confident Life, January 12 – December 8, 2026. Over the course of a year working with me and other smart dynamic women, you will learn how to deploy the four skills of confidence to create any outcome you want in your life.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to unfuck your brain. I'm your host Kara Lowentile, master-certified coach, and founder of the School of New Feminist Thought. I'm here to help you turn down your anxiety, turn up your confidence, and create a life on your own terms, one that you're truly excited to live. |
| 0:21.3 | Let's go. |
| 0:24.8 | Welcome to this week's coaching hotline episode where I answer real questions from real listeners |
| 0:31.2 | and coach you from afar. |
| 0:33.6 | If you want to submit your question for consideration, go to unfuck your brain.com forward slash |
| 0:39.5 | coaching hotline, all one word, or text your email to plus one 347-997-1784. |
| 0:48.0 | And when you get prompted for the code word, it's coaching hotline, all one word. |
| 0:52.6 | Let's get into this week's questions. So here's the first |
| 0:57.6 | question. I'm struggling with my thoughts and actions on play with my child. My child is a preschooler |
| 1:04.0 | who, like many preschoolers, loves to direct our play and tell me how to position my hands, |
| 1:09.1 | where to stand, what to say, what facial |
| 1:11.5 | expressions to make, etc. I feel annoyed that she's trying to control me and tired of being bossed |
| 1:16.6 | around. But of course, those are just thoughts that I can change if I wanted to. However, when I think |
| 1:22.2 | about changing my thoughts, I'm overwhelmed by conflicting messages about how parents should be with |
| 1:27.2 | their children, i.e. be |
| 1:29.1 | authentic versus indulge your child's desire for connection. How do we show up as our authentic |
| 1:33.8 | selves when sometimes our authentic self feels like leave me the fuck alone? I love this question. |
| 1:39.3 | Okay. So number one, I think this is an amazing opportunity for you to empathize with your toddler, right? |
| 1:46.3 | Your preschooler. |
| 1:47.6 | So you say, I feel annoyed she's trying to control me and tired of being bossed around. |
| 1:52.8 | Like, imagine how your preschooler feels, right? |
| 1:55.8 | Whose whole life is determined by other people. |
... |
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