This is self-work, and I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford. At self-work, we discuss psychological and

emotional issues and what you can do about them, whether that's learning self-acceptance,

taking action, or seeking therapy or treatment. Eight years ago, I extended

the walls of my practice to reach those of you who might already be knowledgeable about middle

health treatment, but also to those of you who might say, you'd never darken the door of a therapist.

And yet, you are here. I'll answer your questions while I invite you to take a few minutes for your

own self-work.

We'll go anywhere and we'll help anyone, but we really want to look at getting access to the resources

and the knowledge and help people to be honest about their shame with it

up front. And if we can do that, maybe people can save lots.

Welcome to this week's edition of Self Work. First of all, today, I want to read the first thing you see

on my guest's website. It says Ella Elizabeth Thomas died by suicide at the age of 24. She was the

brightest light in any room, bold, funny, charming, feisty, brilliant woman and beautiful.

Deeply loved and sorely missed, Ella's loss has led the Thomas family to create the defensive

line to help build a world in which no young person of color dies by suicide.

I was introduced to Martha and Chris Thomas through a family member who told me about their daughter's suicide and how they'd chosen a path along with their son Solomon to try and prevent any other family from living through the horrific pain they've experienced.

Not only are they incredibly transparent about their own individual struggles, with Solomon battling suicidal thoughts himself after Ellis' death,

to Martha going to his NFL team leadership to help her help her son.

She said, I can't lose another child,

even though Solomon might have greatly resented her for that.

You just don't do that in the NFL.

But also Chris told his

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