Banter is a muscle to be flexed daily. "A man who stands for nothing will fall for anything." -Malcolm X The Cheat Sheet: Do you always have to be funny to create banter? What is the conversation formula? What are the three traits you want to embody through banter? What is "yes and" and how does it apply to bantering? How can you practice banter? And so much more… One of the keys to connecting with anyone is banter. Whether you're hanging out at your third place or you're out with your boys and spot a girl you'd like to chat up, banter is the best way to strike up a conversation. On this toolbox episode of The Art of Charm we'll talk about the 3 characteristics you embody through banter, how to keep it playful throughout and why you don't have to be funny to be good at banter. Click Here to Support The Show and Check Out HostGator! More About This Show: Banter is a playful, lighthearted conversation between two strangers to ease the tension of getting acquainted, in this episode we're primarily discussing how to use it to chat up a woman you haven't met before. There are three traits or aspects of your personality you'll be highlighting when using banter: your playful side, your lack of need for others' approval and your sexual side. 1. Your playful side.You open the conversation with this side of you. Ask her a question like what is she drinking? Who is she here with? Why is she out tonight? A who, what, where, when, why or how question is a good opener. When she answers come back with something playful. Like if you ask her what's drinking and she says cosmo, tell her it'll never work between you because your last girlfriend drank cosmos and she was a lush. Make it playful, smile with your lips and your eyes when you respond and you'll put her at ease and you'll also be giving her a role to play. 2. You don't seek others' approval. This part of bantering comes next and it's done by misinterpreting what she says to you. Again, always smiling with your eyes and your mouth when you respond to let her know you're being silly, playful and yet you are your own man who isn't reliant on the approval of others, without, of course, overcompensating. There is a fine line between a charming rogue and a boorish try-hard. 3. Sexual. We'll let you learn directly from the AoC coaches during the show for this one. Those are the three traits and the order in which to highlight them. You'll want to practice these to get good at them, banter is definitely a muscle to be used daily. An improv class is a great way to practice banter, and so is chatting up people you interact with every day. Check it out on this edition of The Art of Charm. THANKS AOC! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let us know by clicking on the link below and sending us a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank AOC on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Attraction Toolbox episode The Art of Charm on Twitter Other AOC Toolbox episodes The Art of Charm bootcamps Also sponsored by: You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox-Best of The Art of Charm Podcast On your phone? Click here to write us a well-deserved iTunes review and help us outrank the riffraff! Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices