405: The Beefeater Teeth Awards

Regular Features

Comedy

4.9 • 546 Ratings

🗓️ 1 August 2020

⏱️ 37 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Look what the cat just dragged in: another episode of the Regular Features podcast. As if butter wouldn't melt. As if the cat that drags us around wouldn't use its hot cat breath to melt butter, given half the chance. Get a grip. Who do we think we are? Well we're Steve, Log and Joe, amd we've come back with features about beefeaters, CAMRA awards and an angry man from corporate who didn't sign off on anyone's teeth. Least of all yours.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Regular regular, regular features.
0:01.9	A regular regular regular features.
0:04.0	A regular regular features are regular features a show.
0:07.8	Hello and welcome to the regular features podcast, a podcast that is exactly the same every single week.
0:15.4	And as every single week, I have had dental surgery on my teeth, no less. How does this affect your speech, Steve?
0:24.3	I have a slight speech impediment, because I'm wearing braces. That is the voice of log.
0:31.5	Hi, I'm Log, and I'm going to be asking Steve about his mouth. And I've also got a feature about my pub and the award I got.
0:38.9	We're also joined by none other than Joe.
0:42.0	Hello, how the devil are you?
0:45.1	What's your feature this week, Joe?
0:46.5	Um, well, I can't really tell you, but that's a sort of surprise bailiff-like intrusion
0:53.0	into the podcast coming down the line.
0:55.3	You've got a manila envelope with a wax seal.
0:58.0	It says, getcha.
1:01.5	And I've been wondering about what to do about beef eaters.
1:07.1	Beef eaters have been made redundant because the queen apparently
1:11.4	cannot fund their lavish ruffs
1:14.2	and ornate septus
1:16.7	can't afford the sheer amount of beef they require
1:19.5	can't even imagine a beef eater naked
1:21.7	what shape are they under all that
1:23.7	there's so much are they musley
	...

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