397: Snooker Loopy

Regular Features

Comedy

4.9 • 546 Ratings

🗓️ 14 May 2020

⏱️ 37 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Pot the reds then screw back for a brand new episode of the hippest podcast on the baize. It's Regular Features, you filthy little pocket botherers, and this week we've gone simply loopers for the ol' spoopers. The snockets, the cue stew, the hot pink smackers. It's SNOOKER baby, and that's all she wrote. Log's got a side-gig writing for right-wing journals. Joe is doing the snooker thing I just mentioned. And Steve's been watching too much RuPaul to do anything else of note. THANKS TO INCOMPETECH AS USUAL: The Entertainer and Gymnopédie No. 1 - Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Transcript

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0:00.0	regular regular regular features a regular regular regular regular features a regular regular regular
0:05.3	regular features a regular show hello and welcome to the regular features podcast the podcast that is
0:11.6	exactly the same every week i'm steve and as i am every week i'm joined by my good friend joe
0:20.1	scrabbles hello how are you doing i'm good i'm also good thank you for asking and i'm'm joined by my good friend Joe Scrabbles. Hello, how are you doing? I'm good. I'm also good. Thank you for asking. And I'm also joined by my good friend, John Blythe. I am so good you wouldn't believe. Let's just take it. Just take it or leave it. Take it or leave it. Deal with me. I'm just fine. I'm going to take it. I'm going to put it in my pocket. My back
0:39.5	pocket. My asshole. I did not consent to that, but I'm not going to say no. Now I'm there.
0:46.4	Who's got features to do this week? Me, Daddy, I got a feature. I'm going to take you on a tour around
0:52.9	the genre of snooker music and hopefully add to its wide and sexy canon.
1:00.8	The discography of snookography is lacking.
1:04.9	Log?
1:05.4	Well, I'm going to give you a little update into my tomb blast life and then I'm also going to tell you about my new article
1:11.9	that I've written for the Daily Telegraph. Gainful employment, is it? Yep, I am breaking my own
1:17.9	furlough to have op-heads in the right wing press. That sounds great. I'm going to read it out to you
1:23.0	in a funny voice. And I, in lieu of the other feature, I have just decided to be here as a, as a
1:30.1	general motivational support for both of you, because I know you can't do anything if my eyes
1:38.8	aren't locked on you throughout this soon chat. You've got a big yellow light on your face in your big blue room.
1:46.1	Yeah, it's a Dyson light and it's natural.
1:49.9	See?
1:50.2	It's a, oh, I thought you meant it's, you've got a Hoover on and it's just shining on your face.
1:55.3	Now, Dyson does hovers which suck, fans which blow, and lamps which glow.
2:02.4	Oh.
2:03.7	Suck, blow and glow is Jeremy Dyson's catchphrase.
2:08.8	He would hate that.
	...

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