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Lewis Black's Rantcast

#39 - Bagram, Kandahar, Kabul, Oh My!

Lewis Black's Rantcast

Lewis Black

Comedy, Leisure, Stand-up

4.8803 Ratings

🗓️ 21 April 2021

⏱️ 87 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Back when Lewis was barely AARP age-eligible, US forces invaded Afghanistan and now, nearly 20 years later, your esteemed host is fully qualified for Social Security. And come September, the US military will have fully withdrawn from the Central/South Asian Republic. What did it all mean? Did the US occupation amount to anything? From having done three USO tours there, Lewis has some personal observations: The experience of being there was a truly life-changing experience, akin to an insane LSD trip (not in a bad way); the level of sacrifice from the soldiers there, whatever the justification of the mission, was astonishing; and that saying “thank you” to those who served is meaningless without actually supporting the troops with whatever they need once they return stateside. In other news this week, the Duke of Edinburgh, Prince Philip passed away and so did Ponzi scheme perfecter Bernie Madoff. Lewis was once in an ABC miniseries about the latter which featured Richard Dreyfus as Bernie and Blythe Danner as his wife, an experience Lewis felt made drama school finally worth it. Many Republicans have stepped in to fill the chaos void left by the former leader, typified by the proposed America First Caucus, a group of representatives keen on returning the US to its supposed Anglo-Saxon roots. Lewis has a modest proposal for them: if they want to return to a pre-21st century time, let’s take some of that infrastructure money, build a time machine, and send them back to whatever time period they would feel comfortable in. Maybe a plantation would do. After the mass shootings a few weeks ago, Lewis went on a rant of his own about the need for common sense gun control legislation, and as part of that, asked for rebuttal submissions. So we start this week’s rants with a counter response averring that many proposals to curb gun violence by restricting gun ownership are based on false premises. From there things perk up a bit with rants about the inanity of planning an indoor surprise party during the pandemic, packages being delivered to the wrong address, personal products application confusion, mask wearing, running a small business during the pandemic, and roundabouts. Plus, the rubber chicken controversy continues. Lewis’ new special, Thanks For Risking Your Life is available now! https://tlbrecords.lnk.to/LewisWE New episodes arrive every Wednesday. SUBMIT RANTS TO LEWIS www.lewisblack.com/live SUBSCRIBE TO THE RANTCAST www.lewisblacksrantcast.com FOLLOW LEWIS www.lewisblack.com www.youtube.com/officiallewisblack www.instagram.com/thelewisblack www.facebook.com/thelewisblack www.twitter.com/thelewisblack www.tiktok.com/@thelewisblack For advertising opportunities/contact email: [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

And the rubber chicken says, from where I roost, I have to say America is dumber than a rubber chicken, and I don't know, because I'm a rubber chicken.

0:32.2

Yes, you are.

0:33.9

And thank you for that insightful piece of criticism.

0:37.1

But now it's time for Lewis Fl's rantcast, number 39, entitled Bagram, Kandahar, Kabul.

0:47.0

Oh, my.

0:48.4

Yes, sir, this is the week.

0:50.9

Well, not this week, but the week we decided, actually, that after 20 years,

0:57.6

we are leaving Afghanistan just in a nick of time.

1:02.6

Woo!

1:03.4

That was close, huh?

1:05.9

Boy, oh, boy, wouldn't want to overstay our welcome.

1:10.5

A 20-year war.

1:12.5

Gee, that's the kind of shit you read about in history books.

1:15.9

And I'm sure we will be.

1:17.9

Well, at least our children will be.

1:19.5

And I'm sure the historians will be telling us about it.

1:24.0

They'll clear it up for us in a number of years.

1:26.2

There'll be a book that will come out. A novel, maybe. Maybe you'll find out from a movie what the fuck happened or what it all

1:33.0

meant. Probably, for many of us, it'll be in a Netflix series or Amazon Prime depending.

1:39.5

Maybe Hulu. Maybe each one will have their own interpretation by that, depending on what party they're working for.

1:48.0

Who the fuck knows?

1:50.0

But I should know more than I do because I was actually, I spent time there.

...

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