This is self-work and I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford. At self-work we discuss psychological and emotional issues and what you can do about them.

Whether that's learning self-acceptance, taking action, or seeking therapy or treatment.

Eight years ago, I extended the walls of my practice to reach those of you

who might already be knowledgeable about mental health treatment, but also to those of you

who might say you'd never jark in the door of a therapist.

And yet you are here.

I'll answer your questions.

While I invite you to take a few minutes

for your own self-work. I saw an old high school friend years ago who'd moved from our hometown to

northwest Arkansas and I totally forgot that her mother had died. I asked how's

your mom? She looked at me more than a bit surprised. I felt awful, but in this

episode we're really not talking about just true mistakes you make out of a memory lapse.

We're focusing on when you really care, when you're trying to be

there for someone you love. How do you voice that? Welcome to this week's

edition of self-work. Often people come into therapy because they are grieving something that's happened to them or

someone they love.

From getting through divorces to illness to deaths, your life can be turned on a dime in a

seeming second.

And you need your friends and loved ones to get out of the way and understand that you're grieving,

but at the same time provide comfort.

But that's not always what you get. Maybe it's laughable, but often

either the most self-centered or stupid or awkward responses will come your way. Again, well-meaning often, but sometimes you have to laugh.

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