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The Basement Yard

#361 - Vabbing: Attracting Men With Your Own "Scent"

The Basement Yard

Santagato Studios

Comedy, Improv

4.913.5K Ratings

🗓️ 29 August 2022

⏱️ 65 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

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Transcript

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0:00.0

Welcome back to the base been yard Frank. How's it going buddy? It's going. I'm here. Isn't it?

0:05.0

It appears to be going. Yes. I have switched my I no longer play for the Yankees. I play for the Mariners now. Oh, I'm moving out to Seattle. Oh

0:14.5

I'm not going to Seattle. I hear it's a very depressing place. Yeah, like rains all the time. It rains all time. I'm actually going in October. You're going in October to Seattle?

0:22.4

Yeah, well, we're not staying in Seattle, but we're like doing hikes and stuff. Oh, yeah, but I mean Seattle doesn't really I heard it just rains and I hear it rains and people over there kill themselves.

0:34.4

A lot. It's not a joke. I don't mean apparently Seattle has like a high rate of we just started the episode. I don't. Sorry. It's 7 a.m. for some people. It is 7 a.m. for some people. Most people probably. Yeah.

0:46.6

No, apparently they have a high high sui. I see a right a sui. And I remember hearing about that from a really reputable source. I watched a documentary on Kurt Cobain.

0:58.1

Because he was from, you know, Nirvana. We're going to jump off the topic of real fast. You don't want to jump. You don't want to talk about Kurt Cobain blown his brains out.

1:08.0

I allegedly allegedly what was your name Courtney Cot? No, it's her. What's your name from friend? Courtney love. No, that's Courtney Cox. Yes. Courtney love. Yeah, yeah.

1:18.2

Growing up with the last name Cox. I'd be rough. Dude, Cox, gay. Yeah, yeah. What other last names? Or I mean,

1:25.6

people named Richard. Yeah, Dick. Why did we get dick from Richard? I don't know. That's bullshit. I think that was someone that like met a

1:32.0

Richard and they were like, you're fucking dick. Yeah. And they're just like what a fit. But for everyone out there, don't worry. We're not going to talk about

1:38.2

Penises this entire episode. We're going to talk about a giant. We are. We have a big vagina.

1:42.4

This is a big listen. We have to honor this, the, the sponge of the earth. Yeah. And we have. Frankie's been calling the

1:49.0

vagina sponges and I can't. He actually said before we started, it's like, why don't we call why what would you say? Why aren't we calling my sponges and sponges? And I'm like, why what is the, what is it? I just, I think what are they

2:01.5

soaking up? I think that they're not necessarily soaking. I just like we often talk and we don't always say vagina. We say like bones. Yeah, we make

2:12.8

sure I said, I said, Bunch, and I heard sponge. Bunch, yes. And then I thought more about it. And I was like, all right, well, let's, let's be practical here.

2:20.1

Mm-hmm. A sponge is an absorbent material. Porus. Porus. Mostly can be rough on top. It can. Have that little, when they have the little scratchy

2:31.2

bristly pad on top. You need, well, of course, they need it for friction. You need a course rubbing clean. Yeah. And then they get

2:38.7

really wet. They do. If you, if you mash them. If you, well, hold on. I didn't go that way yet. Yeah, I'm just saying, but no, they do. They retain moisture. Yeah, you know, and I just, you know, in theory, like you can

2:53.7

call it a dick. And they clean. They clean. They clean the, the, the, the, the, the, the elves kind of. They do. It's like a self-cleaning thing. Thing. I think. Yeah. But sponges aren't self-cleaning. You have to add something. Well, well, when you get soap, it's like it kind of,

3:08.3

it never gets, did they get dirty? I think they do. I don't know. I do know that like with vaginas, because, you know, let us tell you guys to, yeah, straight man.

3:20.7

It's just gendered, by the way. I tell you about vaginas. Um, I think they do get dirty.

...

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