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The Alisa Childers Podcast

#346 You're Not a Victim of Motherhood: Pushing Back on Victimhood Culture, with Abbie Halberstadt

The Alisa Childers Podcast

Alisa Childers

Christianity, Religion & Spirituality, Spirituality

4.85K Ratings

🗓️ 30 November 2025

⏱️ 52 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

When motherhood feels more like a thousand little deaths to self than the glossy highlight reel on Instagram, is it really worth it?In this episode, I’m joined by my friend Abby Halberstadt, better known as M is for Mama, to talk about her new book, You Bet Your Stretch Marks: Finding Beauty and Worth in the Ways Motherhood Marks Our Bodies and Souls. Abby is a mom of 10, a fitness instructor, and a deeply theologically grounded voice speaking into the chaos of modern motherhood. Together we tackle comparison, cultural backlash, “honest motherhood,” and what it really means to live as a faithful, joyful mom in a world that often treats children like a burden instead of a blessing.We talk about:Why our “marks” (stretch marks, scars, sleepless nights, and hidden sacrifices) can be beautiful testimonies of love, not flaws to hideHow to push back against a culture that normalizes complaining, victimhood, and joking about hating motherhoodThe difference between rejoicing in all things and enjoying all thingsHow our words, attitudes, and even facial expressions shape the spiritual atmosphere of our homesComparison, social media, and what to do when people accuse you of being “fake,” “toxic positive,” or “doing it for the ’gram”Training our kids with a long view of legacy parenting—seeing everyday faithfulness as an investment in generations we may never meetWhy obedience to Christ in the hidden, thankless moments is always worth it, even when our feelings lag behind our theologyAbby also shares personal stories of suffering, health struggles, miscarriages, and how God’s kindness and sovereignty sustained her through it all. If you’re a mom who’s tired, discouraged, or tempted to believe the lie that you’re “not enough,” this conversation is for you.???? Resources mentioned:Abby’s book: You Bet Your Stretch Marks: Finding Beauty and Worth in the Ways Motherhood Marks Our Bodies and SoulsAbby online: @m.is.for.mama on Instagram and the M is for Mama podcastIf this episode encourages you, consider sharing it with a tired mom friend who needs to be reminded that her quiet, daily faithfulness really does matter—and yes, it’s worth it.------------------------------------------------------------------This video is sponsored by:RANGE LEATHERAmerican-Made Craftsmanship from WyomingGo to www.rangeleather.com for more informationUse my code: ALISABRAVE BOOKSEntertainment that Engages the Imagination for Good. Go to www.bravebooks.com/childers for more informationUse my code: CHILDERSSUMMITGive your kids a stronger foundation to embrace a biblical worldview.Go to www.summit.org for more informationUse my code: ALISA26--------------------------------------------------------------------To Purchase the new CD, “Beauty from the Ash”, go to www.alisachilders.com/musicThere you can get the CD, backing tracks, string charts, rhythm charts and stems.Support us on Patreon: www.patreon.com/alisachildersTo order “Another Gospel”: www.alisachilders.com/another-gospel/To order “Live Your Truth": www.alisachilders.com/live-your-truth-and-other-lies/To order “The Deconstruction of Christianity”: https://alisachilders.com/the-deconstruction-of-christianity/For Alisa's Merch: https://alisachilders.creator-spring.comTo see what gear Alisa uses to record her podcast, go to:https://kit.co/alisachildersPotential Sponsors: https://alisachilders.com/sponsor-request-form/Product links are affiliate links which means if you buy something we'll receive a small commission.

Transcript

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0:00.0

So when we get that pushback from culture that says, well, it must just be because you have it easier than I do.

0:06.4

Or, you know, you must just be doing it for the gram.

0:10.3

It's probably just, you know, she's lying or whatever.

0:13.2

We can say, I can't prove you wrong.

0:16.3

My circumstances might be different or like objectively less challenging than yours in this particular moment.

0:23.6

You might not know all of my circumstances that might be harder than yours and I don't have to prove those to you.

0:28.6

I can trust and adjust judge, which is God.

0:32.6

So when I'm reviled, I don't revile and return.

0:44.6

Hey, everyone.

0:45.4

Welcome to the show.

0:46.3

I'm Elisa Childers.

0:51.6

This is the Elisa Childers podcast, and I have a great episode for you today with my friend Abby Halberstadt, better known as M is for Mama. This episode is for all of you

0:56.9

moms out there. I love Abby because she has such wisdom. She's funny. She's very theologically

1:03.4

astute and theologically sound. We're going to get into all of it in a moment. But I want to let

1:07.5

you know that today's episode is brought to you by Brave Books, Christian

1:11.0

Children's Entertainment Company. Love what they're doing. Go to Bravebooks.com slash Childers and use

1:16.2

my code Childers for 20% off your order. Before we get into this conversation with Abby, I want to let

1:22.2

you know that I am going to Israel June 1st through the 10th, and there are some spots open for any of you who want

1:29.0

to come with me and Dr. Mel Winstead of Southern Evangelical Seminary. I'm so excited about this trip.

1:33.9

I've never gotten to go to Israel. This will be my first trip, and there are a few spots left.

1:38.8

I would love to see some of you guys fill those spots so we can spend some time together

1:42.1

10 days in Israel over the summer. I will put a link to the registration in the show notes. And again, I would just love to see as many of you as possible come out for that. Spots are filling up fast, though, so you're going to want to jump on this if it's something that you want to do. All right, I'm very excited to bring you this conversation with Abby. I know if you're anything like me, sometimes you just feel really overwhelmed as a mom. You feel like you're not doing all the things you should be doing. Each phase of life of our kids presents new challenges. I was just talking to my husband the other day about how now as my kids are kind of coming into the mid and older teen years, the worry that I have to fight is a different kind of

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