343 SelfWork: What's Emotional Regulation? It's Both Self-Control and Self-Protection
The SelfWork Podcast
Margaret Robinson Rutherford PhD
4.8 • 1.3K Ratings
🗓️ 9 June 2023
⏱️ 26 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
There are a lot of mental illnesses that are characterized by intense emotion which then governs behavior, such as in bipolar disorder, major depression, or several personality disorders. But even it it’s a pattern, and not an actual mental illness, it may mean that you don’t have the skill to regulate your emotions – to have control over them instead of them over you. What does this look like? You get angry at a friend and you text them impulsively about your feelings instead of taking a minute to cool down. You get dumped by someone you're dating and you immediately head to the nearest bar or pub to work on getting picked up.
That’s what we’re going to focus on today. How do you learn to more self-control emotionally or how to “self-regulate” those emotions? We’ll also talk about when intense control over emotions is highly self-protective.
The listener email follows this subject line as well, but is more about the listener’s recognition and identification with perfectly hidden depression. But they put a bit of a different spin on it – and are asking how I might suggest they “explain” PHD to a new therapist.
Vital Links:
Link to sign up for CE training on June 27th at 9:00 – noon CT.
Psychology Today article on self-regulation
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You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive my weekly newsletter including a blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!
My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression is available here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life. And it's available in paperback, eBook or as an audiobook!
And there's another way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This is Selfwork, and I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford. |
| 0:14.1 | At Selfwork, we'll discuss psychological and emotional issues common in today's world |
| 0:19.0 | and what to do about them. |
| 0:20.4 | I'm Dr. Margaret, and Selfwork is a podcast dedicated to you taking just a few minutes today |
| 0:26.2 | for your own Selfwork. |
| 0:29.9 | Hello and welcome, or welcome back to Selfwork. |
| 0:32.7 | I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford, and I started Selfwork now about almost seven years ago to try |
| 0:38.6 | to extend the walls of my practice to those of you who might already be very interested |
| 0:42.8 | in psychology or emotional functioning, maybe you're already in therapy, to those of you |
| 0:48.0 | who might be looking for answers, perhaps you've just recently been diagnosed or you're |
| 0:52.4 | dealing with something that you just don't understand. |
| 0:55.3 | But also to a third group of you, those that are pretty skeptical about the whole mental |
| 1:00.0 | health community and certainly going to a therapist, so I wanted to give you a chance |
| 1:05.6 | to hear what a therapist might think like or might be like, and hopefully you'll give |
| 1:12.2 | us a chance. |
| 1:14.2 | I want to tell you, those of you who might be therapists and looking for continuing |
| 1:18.3 | education, C-E-U-Y-O-U exclamation point, is a group that I do trainings for, and I'm |
| 1:26.2 | going to give a training on the hidden risk of suicide, actually that's perfectly hidden |
| 1:30.8 | depression, on June the 27th from central time, 9 to noon, and I'm going to have a link |
| 1:37.4 | to sign up for that. |
| 1:39.4 | So if you're interested and want to get that training, I just wanted you to know that |
| 1:43.1 | there will be a link in the show notes for that continuing your training. |
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